Sex Archives - Page 8 of 27 - Kingston Expressions

The Bad Sex Chronicles (From No Sex To WTF Was That Sex Edition)

October 11, 2017 by admin

Happy Hump Day! Today I’m going to cover two articles I came across. I read one on xoNecole (about a woman who saved her virginity for her husband only to end up with bad sex) and one in Essence (about a woman who has not had sex with her husband in 3.5 years!). Now let me start off by saying two things: (1) I do not give married people advice so I can only approach these two topics as a single woman dating and (2) SEX IS AN IMPORTANT FORM OF COMMUNICATION!!!! The latter gets so downplayed…especially when people are deeply religious! I’m more spiritual than religious so I have no issue with going there! Recently, my own sex life was slipping but I did not let it go down in flames! I had a talk with the Ex Factor that put us on an orgasmic upward swing. ? If you have been dating for years, you can find yourselves in a rut just like any married couple. Sometimes it’s because you guys are taking each other for granted and/or the world just swallows you up, whether you have children or not. That’s one of the myths I want to debunk! Children are not the only thing that can kill your sex life! So many things come into play as grown adults try to make it in the world! Still got to make time to touch each other in loving ways though! That takes me to Bad Sex Chronicles number 1: the virgin. Now I’m not going to tell you to wait for marriage or not. I did not and I have no regrets about that. I was two years old when my parents got married so they surely didn’t stress that I had to wait for marriage….they just had three rules: (1) Sex safely and responsibly on my own terms, (2) don’t be giving it away to everybody, and (3) always know who your baby daddy is! My folks are not about that Maury life! ? The rules were the same for the boys and the girls in my house. The Michaels were not trying to be young grandparents and so far they aren’t! ?? So that debunks another myth that if parents speak to their kids about sex then kids are going to be out there doing it. Nope! I lost my virginity when I was almost 19 years old and already away at college but I digress. If you saved yourself for someone and the sex is unsatisfying…you must talk about it! Now many people asked how did this young lady know that her husband’s sex was bad sex when she had never had it before… um you don’t have to have had it before to know your body doesn’t like that type of sex! Julio and I lost our virginities to each other and while I loved the fact that we were comfortable enough to explore with each other….I almost immediately wondered what it was like to sleep with other guys! ? So I knew (from having no previous experience as I did not even let him and his penis play in my vaginal area the years before we had sex) that there was more to sex. My body just knew….so this lady can know too that her husband sucks in bed! Most of the time, bad sex is a sign of having bad communication in other parts of the relationship. Both communication inside and outside of the bedroom can affect your sex life! ? This is so important to remember! If you and your partner are out of sync outside the bedroom…you can best believe your sex life will be awkward at best and not pleasurable at worst! ?? This is why it’s so important to sit down and talk with your spouse. I recommend at least a yearly sex chat if you are in a long term relationship. Preferences change, health issues can develop, and the need for exploration is usually there for one or both parties. Don’t get so familiar that you assume you know what your partner likes! Just because she liked that little thing you use to do ten years ago…doesn’t mean she likes it now…so check in! Be open. Be honest. And give yourselves homework on what you can work on to increase your partner’s pleasurability! ?? Don’t just focus on what you are missing! It takes two to tango so you better figure out how you can step up your game too! That’s what it takes to be a good sex partner! ?? Now what if you discuss what you need in the bedroom and your partner won’t try it or does not improve? ? As a dating person, you really don’t have to take that! So many dicks in the pond that you can just go find one! However, if you are in love (because other things do matter in a relationship besides sex), I suggest seeking out a sex therapist! Life is too short to settle for bad sex! Next up on the Bad Sex Chronicles…the lady that has not had sex with her husband in 3.5 years! Now if he’s not gay or cheating…he may have some medical issue he is not discussing with you. If he still won’t talk about it with you…get thee to that sex therapist! I don’t know how one can survive 3.5 years not being touched by the person they love the most…I was only getting it once a month and I almost burnt down the Ex Factor’s house! ? Just kidding! But in a dating relationship, no sex for 3.5 years and y’all been together for 6 is just unacceptable! When the Ex Factor is not touching me and reenforcing his sweet words with sweet touches…I feel insecure. I want only his touch so if we went that long without doing it…I imagine we would be fighting everyday! Like I said before, sex is not the most important thing in a relationship but it is important! Never forget that. Whether you are having sex or not…it’s going to be an issue that comes up. Once again, be honest and open! I’m not gonna lie…3.5 years of boo not touching me would most likely lead to me cheating! ?? Plus if he isn’t having some psychological or medical issue…he may have already been cheating too! Over three years is just way too much time to not feel connected and there just has to be a breakdown in communication in other areas that is now visiting you guys in the bedroom! Talk about it before things get out of control! In dating, if you find out that you two are not sexually compatible, you may just have to move on cause if the sex sucks now…it won’t get better in marriage! ?? Now the rules get even more interesting when you just started dating! I give bad sex two to three times a try before I decide that that dick ain’t worth saving! But watch out…I gave Elijah three chances and ended up with a rip in my asshole and the rabbit (a sex toy) shoved into my vagina! ??? I should have heeded the warning signs that it wasn’t going to be great sex but to be honest nothing could have prepared me for the crazy shit Elijah pulled! ??? But if you remember correctly, I dated him for 6 months more but I never let his ass touch my pussy nor my asshole again! The nerve!!! ??? We just went on sexless dates! Plus it took my asshole like three months to heal! ?? But back to your possible bad sex experiences! If after two to three times the sex is still bad….I’m done because like this guy ain’t nobody I truly care for! ✌? Now with the Ex Factor things were different. We started off having mind blowing sex for years and only found ourselves in a rut these last two years. If a man you love use to sex you right, work with him! You already know his potential in and out of the bedroom! Communicate! And for the record…the Ex Factor is one of only two men (Crazy from college being the other) that I’ve slept with where I never thought about another guy while having sex with them! Even with Phoenix, I use to pretend I was sexing the Ex Factor! But what makes the Ex Factor the game changer is he is the ONLY MAN that I love AND lust for!!! ? It’s the first time that my heart and my pussy are connected! ?? ~KJM on Hump Day! Happy Humping! ?☺️

The Climax Felt Around The World (The Solar Eclipse Edition)

October 4, 2017 by admin

I had been upset for days but hid those feelings. And here it was 2:30 in the morning and he was trying to comfort me. The Ex Factor did not know the insecurities that laid within me yet they had surfaced all at once and were over flowing everywhere. He tried to calm me from afar…but the tears just kept coming. Finally, I felt his words and I stopped crying. In that moment, I could see how much we had grown. I stopped crying and then he did the unthinkable. It’s like he knew at that moment that I needed him more than even I knew. I needed him…to hold me…to be there for me. He did not start the storm within me but he was the one strong enough to calm it. I assured him that I was okay but he knew I wasn’t. It’s like we were in sync. And that’s when my baby said he was on his way. It was 2:30 in the morning and we lived far from each other yet my baby was on his way. The Ex Factor was coming for me. ?? And I just laid there speechless. ? When he arrived, he looked so handsome. I could see, in one glance, everything that made me fall so deeply in love with him…in Summer 2010. All the arguments and fights from this past year made this moment so much more intense. It’s like the storm had passed and it had brought us closer together. I was so close to giving up but something happened on my last vacation to Vegas. I realized that even a day fighting with him was better than a day without him. I loved him to madness. And he knew it.? There my baby was…quiet yet strong. Strong enough to show up for me. ?He pulled me into him and he held me so tight. It all felt so right. I had grown to learn how to be vulnerable and he had grown to support me in those moments. And so he held me tighter. Soft kisses to remind me that he was here…in the flesh…just for me. He pulled me closer to him and I was open. It wasn’t my prettiest moment. Hair was a mess. Eyes were puffy. And I was in a green house dress. Yet I felt beautiful. I felt wanted. I FELT LOVED. And so he pulled me closer. Our kisses got more intense. It was now 3:30 in the morning. A time that lovemaking could be felt around the world…as many slept or some settled for the touches of total strangers…3:30am was really a time for true lovers. I did not know it then but it would be clear soon….that this was the start of our very own solar eclipse.?? The Ex Factor entered my moistness and I moaned…not just from the pleasure of his touch but from his reassuring words. My lover was making love to me with an intensity I had not seen in him…in so long. I did not question it. I reveled in it. His masculine touch gently securing my womanly desires. It was more than what I had asked the universe for. I was breathing him and he was breathing me. My lover and I were making love. I trembled. I shivered…as if a cold wind had swept through the bedroom. The force became more intense and I could hear the head board bashing against the wall. My lover was making love to me. When I could not take it anymore…for my body was on fire…we switched positions. I had the strength and the dominance to answer his desires. I faced my one true love…trembling yet firm with my strokes. I wanted to ride him into ecstasy for we were in the midst of our very own solar eclipse. I dug my nails into his thighs and commanded that he follow my lead. The Ex Factor whispered those nasty little words that I loved to hear and that’s when I realized that this morning’s ride would be like none other. I focused only on his pleasure. Tasting him. Touching him. Fucking him as he stroked me. Our bodies were in sync…which is such a rare thing for lovers. You see the universe must time every kiss, every caress, and every flow of a couple’s rhythm when it allows them to be in sync. No awkward movements exist here for each lover is calling the other. One cannot exist without the other. One cannot taste unless the other is sucking. Even breathing is in sync. We breathed. We moaned. I dug my nails deeper into him as my legs tightened around him. We were in sync. And just as I thought of only his pleasure. Wanting to bring him to his ultimate pleasure. The Ex Factor pulled me deeper into him. And my body began to erupt. At first I was scared. You see I had forgotten. Forgotten what it felt like. So I was scared because it was familiar yet new. But his touch was so reassuring that I allowed myself to be open to this eruption. Legs shaking feverishly. Body overheated. Nails dug so deep into him…I’m sure I broke flesh. It was our very own Solar Eclipse and we were still in sync! Climaxing together. Exhausted from the maximum amount of pleasure that our bodies would allow…we breathed each other. Breath for breath…our heartbeats were now also in sync. This, my dear friends, was the Climax felt around the world…for I had never had one with a man I loved. ~KJM on Hump Day? My heart is connected to his and my moist island is just for him.

Why Exes Need To Stay On Your Blocked List (The Bitter Man Edition)

October 3, 2017 by admin

I debated over and over if I would write about this incident and finally decided there are some good life lessons in it so I’m going to go there. Let me start off by saying that for the most part, I have always been cool with my exes. Things did not work out and it’s usually for a good reason. I wish them well and I always want them to be happy. The Ex Factor is the only man that I feel if we were to ever split…it would be so hard for me to be his friend but since we are still hot and heavy…I won’t even dwell on that point. ? Now to today’s lesson! Why oh why every time I take somebody off of my well thought out blocked list (minus the Ex Factor) I end up regretting it! ? Took that leprechaun, Julio, off my blocked list to check on him once the hurricanes started rolling through. If you recall, he had been blocked for a year and a half after wishing my relationship with Elijah (without ever knowing a thing about him) death and destruction! ? Now let me be clear, I do not make it a habit of discussing my present relationships with an ex unless he asks! Julio, on the other hand, finds me in whatever state I’m currently living in…to announce his engagements and his pre baby mamas that some how do not seem to ever pan out. I have honestly and openly wished him well because I haven’t been checking for him (on a serious tip) in over a decade. Matter of fact, almost 8 years ago, I told Julio I was no longer attracted to him so he couldn’t even be my fuck buddy. He ain’t seen my kitty kat nor my face since. ???✌?As he was off living with chicks and planning families, I was and am still deeply in love with the Ex Factor. For better or for worse, my heart rides for the Ex Factor and only the Ex Factor! ? Now to this bs. If I had to name my most infamous and unlikeable ex…it would be Julio! My high school and college friends would burn something if they ever found out I was communicating with him! He is the most toxic, hating, and unhappy SOB out of all of my exes! If I ever said a kind word about him it’s because I’m over him so sometimes I under play what he put me through! But to give you an example of Julio’s style….every time I aimed to get a new degree…he would dump me. Matter of fact, our last real break up was at the end of my first year of graduate school. He said it was a family with him or school! Now you know what I chose! My degrees are forever! No regrets because God had a greater plan and love for me! ?? And this was an easy choice for me. I never looked back. Anytime I heard from Julio again it would be when he got his heart broken by some woman. He always thinks I’m his fall back and will always want him but um no. If you saw what the Ex Factor looked like and what Julio looked like…you would get it. The Ex Factor is beautiful inside and out! Positive and caring when he isn’t driving me crazy of course! That’s why he is the ONLY man I would have children with! If we did not work out, I could love again but my womb is only for him. That is how deep my love for him is. But back to this ass Julio. When I unblocked him, he issued apologies, I love you’s, and claimed to be a new man. Of course I’m well aware of the saying that “a leopard never changes its spots.” First conversation was short and okay. Then came last Thursday! When he hit me up, I knew he had something on his mind. My biggest mistake was engaging in this conversation. ? Julio told me that his grandmother had been urging him to have grandchildren so that he would have someone to take care of him in his old age. Wtf nana? That’s a terrible reason to have children! But okay. Now wait for it…Julio then tells me that he’s been on sites looking for women to have children with but don’t want a relationship with them. ???He just wants someone to co-parent with! ? Does this sound like a sane man?! And are there really such sites?! Lawd a mercy! Julio grew up in single parent household so I’m not surprised that he underestimates the value of a two parent household. No matter what…I grew up with two parents under one roof trying to make life and I would aim for nothing less! Now life can turn you into a single parent and if so be it…many people are successful at it BUT to choose that life purposely…well let’s just say no way I would want to do that! ✌?As the conversation progressed, I patiently waited to see where Julio was going with this mess! He finally asked me what my views on children are. I told him they have not changed since we met when I was 15 years old…I do not want children. But there is one exception, if they Ex Factor wanted children, I would aim to give him up to 3 if we were to be so blessed! ? I love children…I really do but I’m not one of those women that must have children. I’ve always felt that way. It’s only a person that could make me consider it. The Ex Factor is the one and only man to make me even think of children. There is just something about him that makes me feel like I could face all my fears and excel at being a wife and mother. He’s a team player and I truly believe he would have my back as we built our family. ? We are both slow on commitment but take it very seriously! Julio, on the other hand, is no one I would ever want to have children with for he does not possess one single trait that I would want my kids to have. Now hear me out…I’m not just saying this because he’s on my shit list. You can ask anyone who grew up with me. Anytime children came up…it was Julio pressuring me. I never had a need. Never dreamt of my children with him like I do with the Ex Factor. I could tell that my response irritated Julio but he watched his words for fear of being blocked again. What he did, on the other hand, was try to politely plant doubts about my situation with the Ex Factor. He was asking why we don’t live together, how old the Ex Factor is, and even what kind of television we watch. Wtf?! I never asked not one question about none of those bitches he dated. Nan questions! Because like…I don’t care! Haven’t cared in 10 years! ?? That is something Julio struggles with. I DO NOT WANT HIM! Matter of fact I’m like all his other ex bitches…we all not fucking with him! Bitches done cheated on him and married the jump off and had children…and Julio still bitter. ?? Like so many years have passed! Forgive her and move on! ?? But there was something I was curious about. The one question I have been asking for years was how the hell did he leave his mama’s breast milk in NYC and end up in the South West? He finally answered. Julio and the last chick he was living with for years decided to move to Dallas. He moved first and she was to follow shortly after. Julio waited 2 years and the bitch never showed up! ??? Turns out she was dating other guys back in the tri state area and never wanted to be Julio’s wife! Now how the fuck did he miss that one? Minding my business I’m sure instead of paying attention to his. I mean he was laid up in the bed with her for years and did not know she did not want him on a forever tip?! Where do they do that at?! And who the fuck waits 2 years for someone? After 6 months in Dallas and she never moved not a box…it should have been clear that relationship was over! ?? When I met and fell in love with the Ex Factor, I never announced it to Julio. I just stopped picking up his calls. It wasn’t until years later did he find out who I was dating! While he calls me up to brag to me that he’s so happy all the damn time!✌?✌?✌? Is looking for baby mamas online a sign of happiness?! I must have missed the memo! Bish…please! God just don’t like ugly! I get why Julio was coming for me in our conversation. He’s bitter and currently lives in a state where bitches need green cards more than dick and he still can’t keep a woman! ? Now I would have never even thought of going there if he weren’t coming for me and mine! To top it off (I don’t know if he does this to the other exes), he swears he knows what’s best for me! Really Julio?! When you never treated me right…not one day in your adult life?! The way he speaks to me is still so fucking condescending! And he acts like my family likes him and they don’t! Only my aunt that practices voodoo is checking for him and that ain’t even saying much because I don’t fuck with her! ✌? However, she is the reason why I know what happened to Julio immediately after he dumped me in May 2007. Julio and my aunt ended up working for the same company. After our final break up, he moved in with some older lady that he met at work. Now this part Julio told me with his own mouth! He and the older lady (not sure how much older) tried to have children. They got pregnant three times and she lost each baby…with the last one being stillborn! ? And what did Julio do? He left her because she couldn’t have children!? That was probably the only bitch that truly loved him! I get leaving someone because you want children and they don’t…but not leaving a woman you claim you love to go find a cash cow that can produce! ✌? And year’s later….the mfer still don’t have children!!!! Sometimes by the woman’s choice because one of the ex fiancée’s had an abortion for him. He wanted the twins and she didn’t! Once again, Julio told me this himself! Julio, maybe if you were a kind and loving person, you would meet a good woman. If the bitterness you throw at me is what you threw at all your women…well it’s no wonder you are alone and desperate! This all sounds so mean but honey it’s the truth! You over there worried about me and the Ex Factor when you should be focusing on getting right in your life. You are the common denominator in all those failed relationships! You stink of sadness and bitterness! It’s crazy how society focuses on bitter women but never check the bitter men! They need to work on their shit too! I have tried to be a good friend to this person but he is just determined to bring me to his level of bitter bitchness and I’m not having it! Julio is now on the permanent blocked list. Ladies, if you blocked an ex after giving it a lot of thought…he needs to stay blocked! Some people are always going to be full of negativity! Julio been an asshole for almost the last 21 years and shit just ain’t gonna change. I’m tired of rooting for and supporting people who don’t support me! And you know what…I love the Ex Factor even more now. For all the crap I have said about him…no matter what…he has my back. Even the times we were broken up…he would speak life into my life. We both still have so much growing to do but I’m so blessed to call him my babe…through the ups and downs. Riding for you and only you boo! ~KJM giving a Charm School lesson on a Temptation Tuesday! ? Remember that love in itself is a risk. No one knows if they will actually get to forever with their mate…until they actually do. Love openly and honestly. Most importantly, get through those hurdles together…when your backs are up against the wall. The Ex Factor has taught me so much. Like how so much good can be on the other side of the bad…if you both put in the work!??

SEX Is An Important Form Of Communication (The Touch Me There Edition)

September 27, 2017 by admin

Happy Hump Day! ? I am now happy to report that I am getting THE SEX on the regular from my babe after we sat down and talked about our sexual needs and desires! ?? My preference would be to have sex twice a week but with our schedules, once a week is amazing and a miracle in itself! ?? I have heard of married people scheduling sex and never thought much of it but it can be a great tool for singles who are exclusively dating too! Careers and life get in the way whether you have children or not. And sometimes we focus on all different types of communications with our mate but forget that touching each other…especially sexually has its importance. Now I’m not saying sex is the only form of communication but I want to stress that it is important. When the sex stops in a relationship…there’s a great chance communication is down in all other areas and one spouse (if not both) are feeling rejected on some level. My friend, Toi from Toi Time, who is also a blogger, often has married women (of all ages) writing in to her stating that they only have sex with their husbands on his birthday and holidays! ? WTF?! Since I’m not married, I’m just going to leave that one alone. However, if you are exclusively dating, are not waiting to have sex when married (this works for couples on the same page), and are not having the sex…something may be off. For example, I have been cussing the Ex Factor out like crazy over the last year! When I was finally honest with myself…a part of my anger came from the fact that he wasn’t touching me enough. I felt rejected. We recently talked about it and he was really surprised. Turns out, my hectic work schedule along with some things going on with him (not having to do with me) was the culprit. He figured he was being understanding by not insisting we have sex more since I typically work between 60-90 hours a week! ? I am doing much better at not working weekends (though my weekdays are still crazy) and making sure I am not beyond exhausted when it’s time to pleasure him and myself. I have to be an active participant in our sex life too! ?? The Ex Factor never even knew I felt this way because I’m always yelling about something else! I’m definitely working on that! Lol. During our discussion about the sex, we both spoke about a sexual goal we want to achieve with the other person. Meaning how we aim to please the other person more. ?He is already acing his while I still have more studying to do! Lol. We also started to experiment with where we have sex and how we have sex. It’s nice to try new things especially after 7 years of mostly sleeping with only him. I use to think only married people can find themselves in a sexual rut but it can happen to any couple…if communication is off. To get us this far, it took me being vulnerable. Once I did that, he too lowered his guard. I had to say to him that it’s not enough that you feel I’m sexy…I need your touch to reenforce your words…and frequently!?? I am choosing him! I only want him inside of me. I crave only him…so he needs to come get this pussy! ☺️ For any couples dating exclusively, I recommend having this conversation even if you feel your sex life is good. The first two years of dating…the Ex Factor and I had sex 3-5 times a week! ? It was the time I felt most connected to him and my body could not do without having him near. ? While I know that things cannot always stay the same…we should be aiming to maintain a good and healthy sex life! And I need that with how stressful my day job can be at times! Our sex is now more intense and more fulfilling. And he surprises me with when it’s going to actually happen! ? ~KJM on Hump Day! Never underestimate the power of the sex! ??

Once A Mistress Always A Mistress? (The Mistress To Wife Edition)

September 26, 2017 by admin

It has been a while since we have gotten ignorant on Temptation Tuesday! No time like the present to do so. ? By now, most of you have heard about the Kevin Hart cheating scandal. Generally, I’m not big on celebrity gossip but when there is a good life lesson in their story…I will go there! Today’s lesson is actually for Kevin Hart’s current wife, Eniko, aka my fake cousin as she is from my island. Let’s lay the foundation for this foolishness. Two things the old school folks have been saying that I have found to be true (1) “No romance without finance!” Any woman who does not believe this…is probably sitting in dark of their apartment waiting to be evicted while Tyrone feeling on her legs! ?? (2) “How you get them is how you lose them!” Now I have done some shady things in my life but I told you I don’t play with marriage. Don’t want to answer to God and the law for such foolishness. I interpret the second adage as…if he was trouble for her…he will be trouble for you! SEE Brad and Angelina for modern day reference! ? But lets take this one step further for those of you that still don’t get it… Ever heard of the saying that “a leopard never change its spots?” I hope the light bulb is finally on now. If you get a leprechaun when he’s trolling….he may take a break, Eniko, but soon he will be back trolling! Doesn’t even matter if there is a pot of gold or glass at the end of the rainbow he has been chasing…he is a creature of habit! Now that I’ve laid the foundation right into Eniko’s ass…let’s see what we can get from this besides leave people’s husband and wives alone! Back in the day, mistresses hid. Now they do interviews, write books, and if the opportunity presents itself…they thrive at being the baby mama and/or the new wife. Brings me to a question. Can a mistress be transformed into a wife by the sheer virtue of that cheating man marrying her? Hmmmm….this is a tricky one. My thoughts….NO unless she is married double the time he was married to the first wife and did not have any real drama where his dick blew in the wind. Let’s call this one the Alicia Keys Syndrome. ? So far Swizz Beatz or Swiss cheese as I like to call him has been doing okay in appearing to be faithful in his marriage. ? According to Swizz, he’s “in love with his wife.” Boo you ain’t never love the first one? Maybe not…but it sure looked like you were invested in the first marriage or else…why marry the first wife? If the mistress does not have the Alicia Keys Syndrome (still remains to be seen how long this syndrome persists) then she is still a mistress! She’s just married now! Now I know some of you are rolling your eyes but feel me on this. Who in the hell is really expecting their union to be blessed when how they got that man was by breaking up another union?! Yea…I don’t think God is present in that second union unless there is some actual repentance! I’m talking about some 1000 Hail Marys and walking on hot coal for a 100 days in the desert…repentance! ?? You cannot build your happiness on someone else’s sorrow! You just can’t! But what you can do is…fool yourself to believe that you are the exception to the rule. ?? Your “ill na na” will keep this one home! Girl bye! Tired of pointing out that even porn stars get cheated on! You hear that! Bitch could be taking it in the ear and the ass and dude may still fuck somebody else! I have heard dudes say ain’t “no pussy like new pussy!” SEE the many male celebrities who cheated with the ugly nanny for references! ? Some men just don’t give a fuck and since we cannot control those men…we as women got to raise our standards and not open up shop to these already occupied husbands! To me, a mistress is a mistress is a mistress….even with a 1000 wedding bands on her ring finger! For her foundation was built off of someone else’s pain and demise. She is never the original! Not because she is the second wife but because of how she got that man! To all the mistresses turn wives including Eniko, you not Gucci…you the knock off…Cucci. You not Obsession by Calvin Klein….you Possession by Kernel Sanders (the smell of cheap fried chicken). ~KJM on Temptation Tuesday! This is why a bish still got student loans…I won’t sleep with married trolls with money and let them wife me! ???

The Age Old Question (Does Age Matter…Only For Women Edition)

September 25, 2017 by admin

I know it’s been a while since I blogged. Part of me has been trying to catch up with my day job and the other part of me has just been happily living life like it’s GOLDEN! ?Just had an AMAZING weekend with my boo and then my family! ?? So grateful for those moments in life where my heart is so overjoyed…that all I can do is feel gratitude! ? Even though I’m still on my weekend high, it’s Charm School Monday…time to get into our lesson! Over the weekend, I was hanging with a group of female friends (of many different ages) that I have had for almost 14 years. They are like family. ? One has recently had a family member (female) that married a man almost 40 years younger than her! I think her family member is a P.I.M.P. ?? but the other women felt she was too old to be married to a man so young. To me, age is just a number. Whatever floats your boat…you should do! And if you can get a younger spouse while living your best SINGLE life…why the fuck not?! ?? Of course our conversation got heated because people always forget that the Ex Factor is 8.5 years younger than me. Since we started dating in 2010, I have had women say some pretty rude shit to me about dating so much younger while most men don’t give a fuck. You see even women buy into the stigma that after a woman is pass a certain age…she must live a limited life…while these men out here…do what the fuck they please and not making any apologies for it! ? Everything for a woman, even if she is not interested in having children, is about her biological clock! Why the fuck is that? ? Now my friends were not specifically speaking of my situation but of course I have a bone in this fight. The first three months into dating the Ex Factor, our age difference did not really cross my mind. I was 29 and he was 20 and our love making showed it! ?? I was just so excited to find out that after 13 years of Julio being the only guy I loved…my heart could love again and much more deeply! My heart was floating outside of my body. I was (and am still) so much in love. No matter what we have been through (even with all the crazy ups and downs)…there is no man I have loved more. ? While my feelings have stayed the same (or even got stronger), three months into dating an associate of mine had just gotten dumped by her boyfriend who was two years younger than her. He broke it off Labor Day Weekend 2010…coincidentally the weekend of my first argument with the Ex Factor. As she cried to me on the phone, the Ex Factor and I were on a date night and about to have some intense make up sex. My associate warned me that a younger man is always going to want a younger woman so watch out with the Ex Factor! ?? That’s the first time age had ever crossed my mind. And that’s when shit got real. I wanted to know if he was serious about me…and of course he wasn’t ready to be and I wasn’t ready to leave him. So we went on…with me now having major doubts. As time went on, my associate started stalking her ex online, while questioning why me and the Ex Factor were still together. If I had been strong then (like I have grown to be), I would have told her to mind her fucking business. Truth be told, I don’t consider a two year age difference as a real one. If you are in the same census bubble…you are essentially the same age! Also, my associate had no proof her “younger” ex left her for any woman much less a younger one! I can tell you from the short time I knew her…that…her elevator did not go all the way upstairs! Her man was in the military and on tour in Iraq and she would send him crazy emails about him ignoring her if she hadn’t heard from him in a day or two! Clearly, she was not meant to be a military wife! ?? But I digress! What I loathe was that she was the first person to plant the seed of doubt that the Ex Factor and I may not work! Since then, it’s been hit after hit when women approach me about the topic. They ask…when will you get married?! When will you have children? Forgetting or ignoring the fact that before the Ex Factor, I never wanted to be married nor have children! And without him, I’m almost certain I don’t want children! Marriage I’m still on the fence with because there are so many reasons people get married for. All of which are none of our business! ?? But I digress again! I asked my brother, Junior, what he thought about all of this and he said there is no science to why a man leaves a woman! While women are over there calculating their odds….men doing them! If he (no matter his age) wants to leave you for a younger woman…he will! ???????? Plain and simple! Yes children are a factor for couples who want children but each couple has to cross that bridge for themselves. For me, if my children cannot have his eyes and his hands…there’s no point in even trying! ? Maybe that’s silly or naive or just maybe…I am one of those women that won’t allow my biological clock to lead me! If we end up working out…great! If we don’t…I will still be okay…because a man nor my reproductive system never defined me to begin with! ?? I am just going to enjoy the time God is giving us and deal with the rest when it’s time. It is crazy to me…that even we women believe that after we reach a certain age…we should be nice and limit ourselves to the few left overs society tells us we are entitled to!!! ??? Maybe a woman marrying a man 40 years her junior is making a huge fucking mistake or maybe…just maybe…that’s one boss bish that decided she is gonna live her life getting the strongest Big O (orgasm) until the day she dies! Maybe that’s a woman creating her own destiny and living a limitless life to the best of her ability! ?? ~KJM on Charm School Monday! To my babe, I’m crazy as fuck and we don’t make sense but I’m riding with you…as far as we can go! ?

Betraying BOAZ, Moses, Elijah, Jonah, Abraham, And David (The Awaiting BOAZ Letter 12 Edition)

August 24, 2017 by admin

It’s been almost a year since I’ve been writing to you, my love, and I have something to tell you. I have betrayed you. Yes you. You that I have not met yet. You that I have yearned for. I have betrayed you my love and I pray you will forgive me. When I started this journey in September 2016, I knew that I was beginning a metamorphosis. Emerging…would be sides of myself that I never knew existed…the good, the bad, and the ugly. I would also learn to fall in love with pieces of myself that I’ve kept hidden. In this journey, I hoped that it would not take more than a year to feel your presence but a las…it’s almost a year.And what I’ve found is that I’ve sabotaged myself every step of the way by laying with a man that disrespects the core of who I am. He has been receiving your treasures…my love, my body, and even my deepest thoughts. That’s where he has laid…in your bed…in our bed. He dwelled there my love. I don’t know why I allowed this cave dweller to take hostage of your jewels…for I received no pleasure from it. His touch is so foreign that I literally feel sick the next day at the thought of him touching me again. Maybe it’s because in knowing I’ve betrayed you…means that I have betrayed myself too. It was too hard to face my betrayal and was easier to fall deeper into it. Sold myself to the devil for less than a penny! You heard that my love? Less than a penny. I did not do it out of loneliness….for the deepest loneliness I’ve ever known is when the Ex Factor is near me. Happy days are when he’s not around. I’m smiling. I’m living. I’m thanking the Good Lord for my blessings. So why betray you? It’s simply out of habit…for I’ve been betraying myself for seven years now. It just comes so naturally, my love. I feel trapped in a cycle of despair. Such a strong and beautiful woman like myself feels helpless. I made some wrong turns but it was done under the misconception of love. Seven years ago, I fell in love with a wolf in sheep’s clothing and I did not even know it. By the time I realized it, I was in too deep. Too hurt. Too confused. And he holds on so tight even after I beg him (almost daily) to let me go. The wolf is patient. I have told him of your existence and the letters I write you. He does not believe in you. So he will wait…wait to prove that you are never showing up. My prayer for you, my love, is that you will be more patient than the wolf and give me time to continue to work on myself. May you be strong enough to hold me through trials and tribulations. May your love feel so secure that there isn’t a day I doubt you. May you not judge me for my weaknesses. May you love me for my strengths. May you be greater than the sweetest dream. Before I close this letter, my love, I need you to do me one favor. I’ve locked most of my jewels away from the wolf…for my spirit could no longer take laying with weapons of mass destruction. But if you ever see me dining with the wolf, do not hesitate to approach us. No words need to be spoken. I will come with you because you are God’s promise to me. May you never doubt that I am yours…from first sight. And may we slowly walk into the life of eternal happiness that God has bestowed upon us. I am yours, my love, broken, bruised, and hurt but still yours. Do not waiver nor tally in your journey to get to me. May you be able to rebuke all the she-wolves you come across on your journey. Whether you are BOAZ, Moses, Elijah, Jonah, or David, I want to reconfirm my love for you. I am imperfectly awaiting you. Trust in that. No imitation will do. ~KJM on Throwback Thursday! Thank you to all that have been following my “Awaiting Boaz” journey. We are just about one year in! Whether you are waiting with me or you are currently with your Boaz, I thank you for your support. I will fall for I am human but I will always get up…because my faith tells me so. ??

Death To The Orgasm (The He Dyes Fruit Loops And Shit Edition?)

August 23, 2017 by admin

I can’t explain to you how ignorant today’s Hump Day blog is about to get! If you are subscribing to my page…please click on the link so you can see AND read the photo that accompanies it! Some woman named, Kyana Williams, wrote an earth shattering post for those of us women who have never had or haven’t had an orgasm through sex in a long while. It’s life changing and a must read! She basically said to get up while having sex with the man that can’t make you climax and go find the most worthless man (probably working in the produce section of a supermarket) and there lies our orgasm! ?? I can’t even paraphrase her right. You just have to read it in her own words but according to Kyana, the worst that man’s situation is, the more she is sure our orgasms are there! ?? Yasss….Kyana took me down memory lane because I’ve only had a vaginal orgasm with Phoenix (once right before my 29th birthday in May 2010) and all through college with Crazy! Now Phoenix is a man going places in life so this post does not apply to him. Though it’s worth mentioning that after I met and fell for the Ex Factor, I never had an orgasm again! I would still go and kick it with Phoenix on my breaks with the Ex Factor but it was never the same because I was fucking with a broken heart! ?But I digress. This blog is really about the men Kyana described in her post…like Crazy. Dude was a townie, not attending Penn State, had a huge penis (my first from the well endowed club), no legal job, did not have his own crib for most of the time I knew him, cheated like a motherfucker, and always had me climbing the walls! Now he was a good obsession to have! As long as you don’t catch nothing nor get pregnant by these fools…this is the sexual Mecca right here! ?? That’s right…homage your ass to a multiorgasmic experience! ? It was so good that the one time I actually physically cheated on a guy…I cheated with Crazy! ?? That shit was mind blowing. I’m losing it just sitting here thinking about how great the sex was. I was hooked and it was the one time in my life that I was dick whipped! All hail King Ding A Ling! ??????? He and I stayed friends for years. I even went back and smashed at the end of Summer 2009….when I had just graduated from graduate school and needed a pick me up. I rented a hotel in State College and boy oh boy did he still have it! ?? The only thing was I knew he was lying about having a male roommate. In my heart, I knew he lived with a woman…his woman but he lied! Had he kept it real…we would still be friends. I would have taken that big dick and walked away but instead he lied until his young bitch contacted me! ✌? I’m not about that drama! I thanked her for the drinks and meals he provided me…with her money and then I cut him off for life! ✌?✌?✌?I can’t deal with liars. You can tell me the worst truth and there’s a good chance I will still be down for you! But once you lie…I’m done! Well except for the damn Ex Factor. There’s always one kryptonite. ?Anyways, back to great sex! Kyana is on to something and I can testify! MOST (not all) ain’t shit dudes are fucking amazing in bed! ?? Think about it…he ain’t got shit going on so he got to be able tear some pussy up! Reflecting on this trifling statement, it has occurred to me that it’s been SEVEN years since I’ve climaxed. And it’s not all the Ex Factor’s fault! I’ve never had an orgasm with Julio, Elijah (how could I with a rabbit (sex toy not animal) jammed in me ?), Mister Toss Salad (though that was one hell of a tossed salad! Had he had a dick that fell between more than my pinky and ring finger…he may have been great! Plus he tossed a salad so well that I kept thinking….how much shit chips does he really like to suck on??), and never with the Ex Factor (his selfish ass never even tried…?). After doing the math…I realized that I’ve never climaxed in my 30s!!! ?And I’m almost 40! Fuck that’s an entire wasted decade focused on love and relationships instead of sex! And I went fucking younger!!! Where the fuck are my rewards?! A dry well and a semi bitter spirit! Hell naw! There’s got to be more to life. As I wait for my King, I sure hope I bump into a dude where sex is his middle name (safely that is) and he turns my ass out! That’s the kind of dude that great sex blogs are made of…?? ~KJM is not humping around on Hump Day but sure is hoping some great penis falls out the sky soon!? Sometimes I feel like unblocking Crazy and getting that old thang back for a night or two…but even I’m not that crazy! Or am I? Stay tuned ?

The Mile High Club (The Porta Potty Feeling Edition)

August 21, 2017 by admin

Every now and then an article will catch my eye that will encourage me to discuss what’s going on in the world. Today is one of those days. I opened up my Yahoo News brief email (don’t judge me for still having a yahoo email address lol) to find that a couple engaged in a sexual act on a Southwest Airlines flight from Atlanta to Las Vegas. Now I fly to Vegas multiple times a year and ain’t never made it to what the old skool folks call “The Mile High Club!” ?Typically, I’m reading, blogging, or sleeping! Call me boring but having sex on a flight has never crossed my mind. Maybe it’s because I’m always traveling alone and not with a spouse though I have heard of people entering the Mile High Club with complete strangers they met on the flight! ? No judgment here…actually…wait just a fucking minute. How does this happen? Now I love flying! Longest flight I’ve ever been on was from Philly to Hawaii. That was I think about 13 hours. I was with two girlfriends…one of which was scared of flying so she happily took some prescribed drugs to knock herself out because there was no way she was going to ruin my first time flying over the Pacific Ocean! ?? But I digress… in those 13 hours, I found myself in a spiritual realm of excitement! I LOVE TRAVELING! It never crossed my mind to go to third base or even worse…HOME base…with anyone on the flight! Not to mention, I’ve never flown First Class…yup that’s right…I’m right there in them tight ass Coach seats chilling! ?? And you know what I remember the most about flying Coach besides them small ass seats?! The fucking bathrooms were tiny as fuck and gave me a claustrophobic porta potty feeling! ? Like if I can hold my pee from the East Coast to the West…I damn sure will! I KEGEL it all the way til the pussy feels like it’s about to fall out! ?? Now that’s discipline and vagina suicide all at once! Lol. If I can’t hold out until I land, the most I go to the bathroom is once (on my way to Vegas or San Francisco). Clearly if I’m flying to Europe or Hawaii…the flights are longer and I will have to hold my breath and brace the stench more than once as I go to the bathroom on my flight! ? Now if one was on a private jet…I can understand joining the Mile High Club. I’m relaxed when I fly so maybe my coochie could pop for the right man thousands of miles up in the sky but not on no damn commercial flight! My pussy ain’t no communal pussy! ?? However to each its own. Hmmm…still TRYING not to judge. ? The fascinating thing about this morning’s article was I’m not so sure this couple joined the Mile High Club from the bathroom! ?According to reports, they just couldn’t keep their hands off of each other! ? Oh really so you just gonna go southwest on each other while being on Southwest?! Yuck! Now y’all know I’ve had sex in front of my roomie in college and maybe a few passerbys. But those were instances where people accidentally caught me. I was just in a mood where I was willing to take the risk. The first two years of dating the Ex Factor…I’m sure so many people saw us having sex. We were just so anytime any place. On our way to dinner, after a movie, and even near the dirty Hudson River. Yea back in the day we was HOT! ?? With our foreplay action and our sex! ?????? Yes yes yes…that’s when we craved each other to the fullest. If ever there was a person that I would have sexed on a flight…it would have been him because out of all my men…he doesn’t embarrass easily. At least…he never use to. Who knows now since we haven’t had that kind of passion and spontaneity in our sex life in years! ? But back to the horny couple on Southwest! I don’t know where these folks had the sex but now their personal life is FBI record…even though no charges were filed. Yikes. ? Friends, be spontaneous with the sex and by all means climax all over the damn place but for goodness sakes keep it classy…or at least sanitary! Lmfao! Ever joined the Mile High Club? Tell Kingston all about it! #goals (on a private jet that is). ? ~KJM on Charm School Monday! ?

What UNForgiveness Is Doing To Your Relationship

August 8, 2017 by admin

Recently, I’ve had a number of readers write to me about how they struggle with forgiving their spouses. One reader is still so hurt from her husband’s affair (over a decade ago). Now you know I don’t like to give the marrieds (or anyone for that matter) advice but UNFORGIVENESS is like my thing (sad to say). While I believe that he did not sleep with her, I spent years punishing the Ex Factor for talking to that chick back in late 2012. You see we wrote some of the rules for our situationship from the jump. Monogamy was one of them. The rule was if we met someone else that we would want to explore with…we would let the other one know FIRST before pursuing the new person. Seven years later and I’ve yet to meet anyone that I want to explore with but I have broken things off to get a break from the Ex Factor and chill with Mister Good For Right Now. With that being said, I held onto that shit until this year! I’ve never trusted him since. It may sound psycho saying this since we were just in a situationship but always remember that for the GEMINI any betrayal is a huge betrayal. We treat it all like your dick or pussy betrayed us. Makes no difference to us if actual physical cheating took place. ?? And that one situation pushed the Ex Factor off of the high pedestal I had him on. He fell from grace and…became HUMAN! But I digress…What I’ve learned from that mess was forgiveness is a one way street that divides at one point. It’s either you forgive and move on or you forgive and rebuild a better relationship (through counseling and strengthening communication) BUT what you cannot do is say you forgive, want to work things out, and then spend every day of the rest of your lives punishing your spouse! ?? Read that line over again! If you lie to yourself and your spouse by pretending you have let go of their infidelity, you are now the person messing up! And worst of all, the person you are enslaving is YOURSELF! ?? Yea…take that in! You are enslaving yourself! The sole reason, I believe, that I have not been able to successfully let go of the Ex Factor is because I never truly forgave him for hurting me back in December 2012! ? Negative feelings can bind you to a person just as much (if not more) as positive feelings! So while I thought it was love that tied me to him, it was really my need to torture his ass for breaking my heart! Sick….I know but knowledge is power and I’m now writing this from the start of a healing place. The thing about affairs is it makes the person cheated on feel less than. Even when we know our worth, the mind is a crazy place. It makes us doubt what the heart tells us….that our spouse is human and made a huge mistake. If your spouse has never cheated again and fully recommitted to the relationship then you need to too! That is unless any cheating is a deal breaker for you. In that case, you may want to forgive and move on. Though if you are married, I strongly believe marriages are not to be entered into nor existed lightly! So you better make sure you’ve done all you can do before you walk away with regrets! Ironically, Crazy slept with half of Penn State’s female population while we were dating and I never held anything against him when we stayed friends for years. I mean I was pissed at the time but because I never truly loved him so my heart and mind did not hold on to his sins! Not to mention, I paid his ass back nicely when I met and chose Jason! ?? Never cheat in revenge! I don’t recommend it but when I was young…I accidentally did and when I saw the hurt on Crazy’s face (though we were broken up so it wasn’t cheating in this instance) as he was fucking up my apartment once he saw the huge hicky Jason left on my neck…I couldn’t help but think we were finally fucking even! ?? But yea…don’t be young Kingston! Lol. Now let me get back on track. Our UNFORGIVENESS is more about us than the person that hurt us. We have to do the work on ourselves (whether or not our spouse recommits to us). Free yourself from the hurt. You were treated less than but you are more than…shown through your love and forgiveness to a partner that is willing to do the work and not betray us again. You are worthy my dear. To my reader I say, God is love and if God can forgive us, who are we not to forgive others? ~KJM on Temptation Tuesday. Strange topic for today but since I’ve been working on myself and the status of my heart…there is no time like the present to discuss something heavy on my heart. I really hope today’s blog helps many. Editor’s tip: when I’m remembering hurts from the Ex Factor, I make a mental note of all the crap he has forgiven me for….because neither of us are perfect! One love?

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