Writer, Editor, & Lifestyle Blogger: Sex, Lust, Love, Celibacy & More 🥰 A woman not afraid to walk in her truth....in style of course 👠 💄
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Written by Kingston Jael Michaels, Performed by Alexis Skyy, Beats by Davincii Productions, Produced by Loyalist, and Engineered by ANS Studios.
Sex should NEVER be used as a weapon in a relationship nor in a situationship! When Julio and I lost our virginities to each other…we promised to never deny each other sex. And we kept that promise for all the years that we dated. Upset, happy, sad, or in between we were vocal about wanting to please the other person. However, I was almost always still mad at Julio even after we had sex!!!! I’m tired of telling folks that I can separate sex and love just as easily as some of y’all separate your groceries! ? Let me be clear though that MY body was MINE. Julio nor any other man had no permission to violate it nor pursue me sexually without MY CONSENT! ?? In every relationship including marriage, men please get consent from the women you are with before ever touching her sexually and if she says STOP….you do that! Rape is nothing to be played with! I belong to GOD and only GOD. And the only human being that can give consent for me…is me! Now that that’s covered…lets go back to the matter at hand. I never use sex as a weapon in situationships nor relationships! But there comes a time in a situationship/relationship that a woman may have to shut down the pussy pot until SHE feels safe and secure enough to open it back up to the man she loves. I am at such a time with the Ex Factor! As my last two blogs stated, we have been arguing a lot lately and the arguments have been the worst I’ve ever participated in! It’s so unlike us! We are having huge power struggles over our levels of commitment or lack there of AND small shit that is just masking the real issue! It’s gotten downright ugly! The Ex Factor appears to be very forgiving and since the last blow out we have been doing much better. Yet all this arguing got me thinking about some advice Grace gave me a while ago….since the Ex Factor seems to be addicted to my pussy pot….maybe it’s time to shut that shit down until he gets that act right! Because I don’t believe in using sex as a weapon, I decided against it. Things have gotten so bad though that even our sex life (in my opinion) is being affected by it. I’m not thrilled by our sex life right now because we are so emotionally disconnected! For me it feels like a dog shitting outside twice a day….a routine….in which one must do to survive. No real thrill in shitting twice a day…but I guess I got to ask a real dog that! Lol. On Saturday, I spoke to the Ex Factor about just being platonic friends….at which he gave no direct reply. Since then we have been texting each other all day again and I’ve even woken up to a sweet text from him. Hmmmm…did you hear that?! That’s the sound of my pussy pot slowly closing!!! I LOVE this man but I’m not going to let him walk all over me and drive me crazy!!! So I’m taking Grace’s advice! Now Tiffany before you freak….I’m not pulling a 6 months without sex phrase like I did with Elijah!!! No way I could do without the Ex Factor’s touch that long!!! But I’m giving us a little time to fix our communication and get back on the same page! I know the Ex Factor isn’t ready to settle down and truth be told….neither am I. But we love each other and love takes WORK! I can’t have him making me do all the work and making me feel bad for it when he disappoints me! It’s time he steps up and perhaps if I’m NOT riding him, the fucking picture will become crystal clear for him that he better get his ass in gear! I’m a beautiful, intelligent, and loving woman but if he gets me to revert back into bad girl mode…he will regret it!!!! The vagina was built to outlast the penis in every way….hence why they usually die before us. Lol. Channeling Mama Michaels here!? Now for those of you worried that he may get it from somewhere else…he better fucking worry that I may do the same!!! Besides I’ve freed this puppy many times and I’ve learn two things (1) them young bitches aren’t taking they vitamins like they should and (2) he does love me. ?? Now if he runs into a mature OG (Original Gangsta) like me…I may be in trouble (lol) but if that does happen…it was meant to happen! If you love something…don’t be afraid to let it go! I pray we fly and not sink but only God knows our destiny! So I close up shop for a bit. I’ve got my day job, this blog, and a vacation coming up that all my need my attention. Taking advice from my homegirl, Harmony, and focusing on me…while letting all that other shit fall in place!?? ~KJM on Charm School Monday saying I’m over here masturbating, counting my pussy hairs, and eating Cheerios!?? Don’t need any man under me that ain’t gonna do the WORK!✌?️ And for any other guy that may be reading this…um if y’all ain’t the Ex Factor…I’m not checking for you so back the fuck up! ??
Do you guys remember when Beyoncé dropped the song “Ring The Alarm” from the album B’day?! I immediately fell in love with it but for some reason mainstream America and pop culture didn’t!!! For those who don’t know, “Ring The Alarm” is an anthem ALL women who knew their men when they were boys and had a hand in “molding” them should learn by heart! Beyoncé gonna ring the alarm (aka fuck him up in my opinion) if the man that SHE upgraded tries to ever leave her for another woman!?? B, I’m right there with you (bat in hand and all)! That’s right…way before Beyoncé got some of y’all chicks in “FORMATION” and had you sipping on “LEMONADE,” B tried to forewarn y’all about what would happen if you upgrade an ungrateful man! But was y’all listening?! Nooo! So ten years later…we had to get our asses in “Formation” for not heeding Beyonce’s message with “Ring The Alarm.” Now let me say this….I’m not a Beyoncé fan but I respect her hustle and support when I can! Jay Z should have named her “the hardest working chick in the game” instead of the “baddest chick in the game!” Beyoncé be channeling her inner Jamaican self….unbeknownst to her…when she drops album after album…even when pregnant! All hail Queen B!?? But I digress. This blog isn’t about Beyonce’s success. It’s got an even deeper message. I look at the Savannah James’ verses the Majorie Harvey’s of the world and I lose my mind! Now let me be clear….I love both women! But they are good examples for where this blog is going. Savannah has known LeBron since they were teenagers, gave birth to two of three of their children before they got married, and stayed with LeBron as he turned into “King James!” Now she don’t look it…but you know home girl been through some THANGS! I can’t even say things! Shit! Props to her for standing with beauty, grace, and smiles while LeBron grew the fuck up! Like I said…I don’t know them personally but I know the fuck what I have been through with the Ex Factor these last 6 years and he isn’t famous!!! His 20s bout to be the death of me or give me some serious jail time because most of the time…I’m looking at the Ex Factor like “no him bloodclot didn’t?!” See blog about the “puppy pissing all over my fucking carpet” for reference! Lol! Savannah, girl, can you send me YOUR playbook because these are trying times and I’ve spent 6 years loving a boy who will one day be an amazing man and I will be damned if some other chick comes along and claims the motherfucking final product! Hold up..wait a minute! I’m having a LEMONADE moment! ?? Woosa! Woosa! Breathe in! Breathe out! I don’t want to have to knock a bitch out! ? lol. Now onto to Marjorie “fly ass” Harvey aka….Steve Harvey’s third wife! Now she may have had some influence on his “Think Like A Man” franchise but so probably did those two prior divorces! Wow! I’m about to lose it! ✌?️ I don’t know for sure but I can almost bet money that his first wife didn’t get this thoughtful, loving, and RICH Steve…Marjorie got! Girl…I pray she is somewhere living her happiness and they all get along well! But if I were her (and maybe she or the second wife did this) I would RING THE ALARM! I mean…I’m mentally out there swinging bats for all the girlfriends, baby mamas, and first wives who put their hearts and souls into supporting a man on his dream and when he became greatness…he bounced with some chick that never had to get dirt on her ankles! Bitch I think not! Back the fuck up! Too much work and too much time was put into this man! Matter of fact….I’m about to channel my inner Angela Bassett in “Waiting To Exhale” and have all his shit burning on my front lawn! Figuratively of course!? Now I’m not saying every first wife molded her man…not saying that at all but for every woman who did…this blog is for you! Sometimes I just want to give up on the Ex Factor! He takes so much patience and understanding that I’m digging for those things in the crevasses of my asshole and am pretty sure they don’t exist! But I’m a mess too….so he could be saying the same about me!? Boys are typically (I’ve found this to be true from my own experiences) many years behind girls from birth! I want to say they start behind in the fucking womb but I have no actual proof of that as I have never been pregnant but I’m willing to bet money on it! Smdh! What we women go through with men is just too fucking much and I hear it’s a lifetime thing! Your man could be 50 years old and still give you a “what the fuck was he thinking…let me get this brick and hit him in the face” moment. Though KJM never promotes violence. ? This is more of a mental exercise! Woosa! Woosa! If I am molding a man to be my King, I’m not just going to easily let another woman come get the fruits of my labor! No way baby! And if they do leave…it’s better to be the wife than the long term girlfriend because at least if you get the right divorce lawyer…a good settlement may be coming your way! Because let’s be honest…these dudes generally don’t have prenups when they don’t got a fucking penny to their names! You can be on the come up and leave me….but it’s gonna cost you! Channeling my inner Vanessa Bryant (Kobe’s wife) here….lol! ~KJM on Hump Day saying you ain’t gonna have me in the streets singing “Not Gonna Cry” because if you get shady….me and my lawyer will “Ring The Alarm!” Shout out to Savannah James, Vanessa Bryant, and Mrs. Marjorie Harvey if you nasty! ??? Lets end the morning on some wise words from Queen B on B’day: [Hook:] Ring the alarm I been through this too long But I’ll be damned if I see another chick on your arm Won’t you ring the alarm? I been through this too long But I’ll be damned if I see another chick on your arm [Chorus:] She gon’ be rockin’ chinchilla coats If I let you go Getting the house off the coast If I let you go She gon’ take everything I own If I let you go I can’t let you go Damn, if I let you go She gon’ rock them VVS stones If I let you go Couped in the ‘bach or the Rolls If I let you go She gon’ profit everything I taught If I let you go I can’t let you go Damn, if I let you go
A woman can be basic and unnatural. As well as a woman can be “natural” and not basic. It’s not really about cosmetics nor style. Basic is a mind frame and it comes in all different shapes and forms. Basic is as basic does…. But let me remind you that the “basic” bitch isn’t better than the “bad” bitch. The bad bitch only has her looks and body to depend on while the basic bitch is missing brains, talent, spine, and perhaps looks. They both aren’t BOSSES?? ~KJM on Charm School Monday clearing up any bad basic confusions lol
Well! Well! It’s Charm School Monday! Typically we learn deep life lessons on this day but NOT today! We are about to get ignorant! First off, I’ve had some down time in the last few days from my day job so my entire focus has been on my blog anniversary project and all the women helping me with it. I’m so preoccupied that I haven’t worn makeup since last Wednesday! Now if you know me personally….you know I have naturally flawless brown skin and I have no issues with rolling out the house with just some clear lipgloss and eye liner (I can’t leave either behind). But generally my face is always beat for the gods!?? Now before I dive into the ignorant mess we are about to discuss….I want to speak to the basic bitches. If you are one…you may want to stop reading! I’m not hating…I’m just stating my opinion. For those who don’t know what a basic bitch is…this is my definition: a simple woman, who doesn’t take care of herself, always got something negative to say about other women who do take very good care of themselves, no ambitions, no goals, a doormat, and essentially a hater herself. Now that we have that covered…on to the NEXT! In general, the basic bitch is not my friend. However, sometimes I envy her freedom to never have pressures to be something….GREAT! The basic bitch doesn’t have to educate herself. She doesn’t need “me” time….she is whatever people want her to be. Me time would put her in a position to think and reflect and that’s just a hell no for her! The basic bitch doesn’t worry about pleasing a soul…not even herself because her “basicness”…for lack of a better word…is enough! She don’t got to keep her waist tight. Forget fashion….usually whatever this green eyed monster (as in jealous individual) sees her friend OR her enemy wearing is what she will be putting on next. The basic bitch doesn’t have to have a personality! As a matter of fact, if one took a deeper look into her mental…the basic bitch has a personality of wet paint drying on a wall! Men (really boys) will choose her over driven women every time because…lets be honest….the basic bitch takes no issue with having a man climax all over her face! Yum! Cum Shots…she exclaims! So much about the basic bitch confuses me. She doesn’t even have to set hair appointments cause to be honest no man gives a damn what she looks like. Forget a mani or pedi! Them toes haven’t been touched in decades unless upon request! These boys know she’s not going anywhere and that’s why they love her! And her self esteem is that of any person within 50 feet of her. She has no real identity! And that’s her real charm! The basic bitch would be forgettable if not for the fact that she lurks behind us strong, driven, and beautiful women! She’s simple minded and just about anything pleases her but don’t you dare call her out on her…“basicness” because she will deny it every step of the way! Still even with all her negative traits, there’s one thing I admire about the basic bitch….she never has to be anything but basic! So here I am on day 5 of not wearing any makeup nor dressing up and a little voice is saying…Kingston, you should have started off your day with a 5 mile run, showered, dressed to the nines, and then took yourself out for a shopping spree and a great lunch! So here I lay in all my “unbasicness” feeling bad about neglecting myself for the last 5 days! Oh the guilt is real! I’m currently dressed up in a beautiful dress (at home lol) blogging, working on my blog anniversary project, and preparing myself for the rest of my work week! Oh why oh why can’t I be basic?! I’m still not wearing any makeup but my skin is glowing and I feel more like my normal self now that I’ve ditched my house clothes. But why oh why can’t I have some of the same freedoms of the basic bitch?! I would sleep better if I had no goals and didn’t have two careers! Oh the basic bitch must feel so restful all the time! On days like this, when I’m short on sleep and obsessed with my projects being executed to perfection, I dream about temporarily being a basic bitch. But even Kingston Jael Michaels can’t live out that nightmare for too long! I’m a BOSS!?? So onto the next project with probably another sleepless night ahead of me….I still got time though…to shout out my basic bitches!? ~KJM on Charm School Monday saying….oh how I wish I could be basic…even for 5 seconds lol ?
This morning I had the pleasure of reading a Cosmopolitan article titled “6 Signs You Are Dating An Emotionally Unavailable Man.” The 6 Signs were: 1. They’re Always (I Mean Always) Doing Their Own Thing; 2. They Avoid All Emotions; 3. They’re Always Looking For Faults; 4. They’re Always Holding Up A Shield; 5. They’re Scared To Show You Who They Really Are; and 6. He’s Rarely Satisfied. Now after reviewing these signs, I realized the Ex Factor is all of the above except 3 and 6. He’s really easy to please and easy to satisfy! The Ex Factor is always so patient with me and my antics! Here’s the BIG REVELATION though…I AM ALSO EMOTIONALLY UNAVAILABLE AND HAVE BEEN MY ENTIRE DATING LIFE! As a matter of fact, the Ex Factor and I are equally emotionally unavailable in all the same numbers! We are 1, 2, 4, and 5! ?? So that’s why I’m attracted to him! My entire dating life, I’ve dealt with emotionally unavailable men (including Julio, Phoenix, and Elijah)! The thing is the Ex Factor is my exact type of emotionally unavailable guy…hence my ultimate attraction and desire for him! We are the same!!!! If you don’t believe me…check this shit out. Before Elijah dropped the “L” word, the last guy before him who told me he loved me…who was my friend/sort of lover (that’s for another blog discussion) AND wanted to marry me…I hung up the phone on him in Fall 2008 and to this day never picked up any of his calls!!! I have some regrets about how I handled that situation and a lot of what I go through in my dating life now…probably stems from some of that Karma! Ouch! Don’t worry…that dude, last I checked, was on his way to being happily married to a woman who could FEEL!?? I did him a favor…plus I wasn’t in love…more like lust mixed with deep intellect! ? But back to my hot ass mess of a life! I pressure the Ex Factor for a deeper commitment because I know it’s not in him to do it! All the other men that could commit, show emotions, AND had great communication skills (yea definitely not you Elijah)…I dump rather quickly or worst cheat on them then dump them! Ouch! Now hear me out…we are close to a break through! Hang on! Let’s analyze the 4 signs that I am emotionally unavailable…according to the Cosmo article. 1. I AM ALWAYS DOING MY OWN THING! This is so true! For example….this past weekend, while resting, I booked ALL my trips from September to January 2017! There is such freedom in saying…I want to go somewhere and I just book that ticket to go! And no the Ex Factor is not invited….nor has any guy I’ve ever been romantically involved with. They ALL weren’t invited to my vacations! I roll solo….even internationally! Just the thought of opening that door and inviting the Ex Factor in…scares the hell out of me. So there I am asking him to incorporate me more into his life and I can’t even do the FUCKING same! Like I get anxiety just thinking about him hanging out with me and my friends on an island. Before you are quick to say…that may be a sign he’s not the one…I went to many countries in Europe, the Dominican Republic, the Bahamas, Barbados, and TWO islands in Hawaii without fucking Julio’s ass! There’s been no man that I’ve ever envisioned joining me on my journey! 2. I AVOID ALL EMOTIONS (except Anger)! My most comfortable emotion is anger! If I get to feeling hurt or sad…someone may get cut! Just joking of course!? But your house may get burned down too if you make me cry! Still joking! ? I HATE crying because that means something has devastated me to the core of my soul. My soul likes to just be chill! Please don’t bother it…with feelings!✌?️ 3. I AM ALWAYS HOLDING UP A SHIELD! Yass! I try to defend AND protect my heart, mind, body, and soul….even if in the process I block true love! I don’t want anyone to get through because they may fail me. I also try to avoid all conflicts by hiding my true feelings about a situation! Like why couldn’t I have told the Ex Factor to his face years ago that I love him and will try to see him through his mess if he would try to see me through mine?! Because I would have to be VULNERABLE! And that’s a no no for me! And 4. I AM SCARED TO SHOW HIM WHO I REALLY AM! The Ex Factor and I had two totally different upbringings. He’s been sheltered and I haven’t been naive since I was 5 years old! I grew up in a very violent manner…watching the women in my family get the shit beat out of them daily! Infidelity was second nature to the men AND women in my family! Shout out to the men who are raising children that aren’t really their’s but they don’t know it! Yikes! MESSY! ? All that violence and all that cheating…can you blame me for not laying with a man for too long? The battered women in my family (who were generally not the cheaters) stayed with these men and took every hit while still pledging their love and allegiance to these fools! NOT I! I always vowed to never be them but somewhere in my life created another unhealthy cycle…a Kingston who is emotionally unavailable and likes her life just that way! That’s why when my friends tell me that the Ex Factor is an unhealthy situation…they are FUCKING correct! But what they need to understand is that the Kingston who loves her friends and will stick by them is NOT the same Kingston in love and war! I’m brutal and I’m selfish at times. I step on whomever whenever the fuck I feel like. That doesn’t mean I’m not trying to grow…I am but my growth is super slow for a woman my age. If some man (other than the Ex Factor) wanted to marry me and start a family right now…my ass would say hell no in a heartbeat! Perhaps I chose the Ex Factor because at 26 years old…he is my emotionless twin! He can’t/won’t give me much but I can give myself everything AND I DO! I can say I DO to MYSELF! Even if the Ex Factor woke up tomorrow and wanted to take things to the next level…we would have to move extra slow (as if we could get any fucking slower?)! I’m scared to chose one man and one life. I need adventure everyday! So maybe the Ex Factor is buying time until someone better comes along but I think because of my gender and age…it never occurred to anyone that I’m doing the same! It’s only in June 2016…that it occurred to me that that Ex Factor may be my one! And I’m still open to the fact that he may not be! But truth be told my 35 year old self is in love with a 26 year old man…and has been…for the last 6 years of my life! We are a fucking mess and my age leaves me feeling insecure because of this thing called a biological clock (still feel like I don’t have one but science says I do). We may never get our shit together and one of us could permanently leave the other but if you were given a choice of who you would want to waste time with….would it be mister perfect resume or the man you know is a mess but you are sure you love him?! There’s a risk in all we do but if you are gonna leap…it better be for someone that the feelings are real for!?? So we stand still in time…together…being emotionally unavailable! I get mad! I get sad! I get frustrated but truth be told if he had his shit together…I wouldn’t even be checking for him because I don’t have my shit together!?? Yea it all sounds like a therapy nightmare! Lol. I’m saving up for it! Trust and believe that! But my eyes are wide open as I take a leap of faith! Don’t expect your girl Kingston to get married and have children…anytime soon….if ever! However, if for some reason the Ex Factor and I become emotionally available to each other…I know we both take marriage seriously! Off to therapy and spiritual counseling we go! After all…GOD IS ABLE!?? ~KJM is a mess on Hump Day!?
Well! Well! What day is it? It’s Throwback Thursday and there’s no time like the present to revisit some of the skeletons in my closet!??? If you have been following this blog for more than a day…you already know that my moral compass is set to SHADY! I have definitely messed with two guys (that had girlfriends) during times I also had someone in my life or during a quick intermission. You know my motto on girlfriend and boyfriend relationships (whether you agree with it or not): here today…gone tomorrow!✌?️I’ve taken chicks’ men (but on the real I always return them) and chicks have definitely taken my men! Such is life. But let’s take it a little further! You know I don’t play when it comes to married men! I’m allergic to them! My motto here is if they are a problem for the wife…then they damn sure are going to be a fucking problem for me! Ain’t nobody got time for that!??✌?️ Plus (and it may sound silly to some of you) I don’t play with what God put together and sealed with His love! Marriage may not be in my future….but I damn sure respect it! It’s not easy for any gender (despite a popular belief that it’s easier for women to commit) to promise to love and be with someone forever! The promise itself may be easy…the work of eternity to grow together and not apart…well that’s some real work right there! Now onto why we are brought together today…we are paying homage to the silent…know her place MISTRESS! Hear me out before you stop reading! The other day I read that a Jersey man’s wife AND long term girlfriend both posted obituaries for him in the same paper…with the same picture!!!! Let’s take that in for a moment! Wife and Mistress both decided to publicly bid farewell to this man! Now I don’t know the situation and I’m not even going to speculate on whether they all knew about each other or not but damn….y’all both used the same photo?! Even more importantly…who in the hell told mistresses they could speak?! I’m being serious here! I wrote “Dear Girlfriend” as my alter ego…it was fictional. Not the content but the me contacting the girlfriend part! Never in my life! Chicks have called me for sure and I don’t get nasty with them. I just skool them….your man is who you need to be yelling at. He made a promise to you! Not me! And trust and believe the times I’ve been cheated on…I’ve had no dialogue with the other woman! If she ain’t my friend or my family…she really owes me nothing! But now wait a minute….if she is my friend or family…her beat down coming first because “chicks before dicks.” That bitch would have owed me more respect to say the least! His house would still be set on fire though! Lol. Figuratively speaking of course…because I’m a lady that knows that success is the best revenge! So y’all don’t be out there living a life of crime over a man! I don’t give a damn if he is your husband…your future and your family matter more than him and his drama! But I digress…back to the outspoken and public Mistress! I remember the days when they just hid in the shadows as folks whispered about them…whenever they would suddenly be in a public place. Even in my generation…mistresses weren’t a valued thing! Monica Lewinsky sucked dick quietly until the scandal broke! Silent is what I prefer! All this “I’m Tiger Woods’ Mistress Number 25” shit got to go! There were so many of them…that the media no longer referred to them by names! Just a fucking public number! And for what?! Interviews and book deals?! In my Toi voice….SAT DOWN! And then briefly get up and have a couple more fucking seats! Mistresses have existed since the days of concubines and perhaps even pass that! They aren’t going away! It’s bad enough to hurt a wife silently but to then go on and publicly disgrace her?! Oh hell naw! Know your place! Gal u no de wife….if you don’t respect anything else about her you better respect her legal title and her divine position! Even in boyfriend and girlfriend situations…I’m not calling up Phoenix’s baby mama! ? Where they do that at?! That is still his child’s mother! If for nothing else…I respect that. Any conversations to be had is between her and him. And Phoenix never dared contacted none of my dudes…even though through social media he knew who they were! He knew his place as I knew mine. We don’t bring drama to each other’s door! To kick this conversation up a notch, I’ve been cheated on many times in my dating life (some I knew for sure and some I suspected). Whenever confronted by a mistress…my motto was always…KEEP HIM!✌?️ Cause I know the devil I laid with and now he’s your problem! The only exception to that rule is the Ex Factor! I truly love him so that shit would hurt! But I have been there before…Even though he denies that anything physical ever happened…in Fall 2012…I felt someone was in my back yard! To my surprise…I didn’t cut his ass…I just left him with no notice and by the time he caught up with me I was down south in another dysfunctional relationship! Now I will always regret Mister Toss Salad but I do not regret moving on when I felt disrespected! I did what I felt was right for me at the time and I had some life lessons to learn about myself! Boy did I learn them too! But on the real…that shit cost us two years! And I digress again! Mistresses need to go back to the old adage of “speak when spoken to!” No need for book deals, public obituaries, nor interviews. ? My moral compass ain’t the best but even I know that disgracing another woman like that just isn’t right! Know your position and act accordingly! Now before I let you guys go….here’s today’s shady comparison! In my eyes…a side piece is a jump off. She has no interest in staying with the man. A side piece never wants the full time job of the wife and/or girlfriend! But a mistress….she’s invested for the long term. She may want him and may even love him. A mistress wants that man to leave his girlfriend or wife! She’s got her “eyes on the prize” (prize…as in lack of a better word). Side pieces tend to stay quiet. Give them the sex and the money and y’all are even. For a Mistress, however, there’s no amount of money that will make her go away! The problem with today’s society (cheating isn’t going away so there’s a bigger issue here) is reality television got every side piece and mistress hyped! Selling their souls double….for some fame! Now it’s hard to tell who’s who! Why do I even bother to make this shady comparison? Because I want to let the men know (same goes for us women as a matter of fact)…choose wisely before you decide to jeopardize your marriage! And if you are dumb enough to cheat…make sure you know whether you are dealing with a side piece or a mistress! The mistress’s under cover job is to wreck your life (not that you needed help)! So you better “check yourself before you wreck yourself”…especially if you do want to work on your marriage! And for goodness sakes….please do not further embarrass your wives publicly! Dealing with cheating is difficult enough much less to now make a public spectacle of it! To the Jersey man who got this whole conversation started…I really hope your wife cremated your ass and got a huge life insurance policy lump sum! As I’ve said in my previous blog…“Reasons Why Her Husband Will Never Be Yours (A Single Woman’s Perspective)”…one of the greatest reasons for never being a married man’s mistress is…it’s financially stupid! If he is worth anything and drops dead….the wife will most likely get everything! My morals are off but I’m always about my coins! Can’t take love for another woman’s husband to the bank! That check will always bounce!?? ~KJM on Throwback Thursday…saying don’t judge me…lol.
Hello all! It’s Temptation Tuesday and I’m stuck in Lincoln Tunnel traffic (via bus of course). Great time to blog about what I consider straight craziness! TRYING TO COMMUNICATE WITH A MAN! ? It’s like one of the most difficult things I’ve ever done! The Ex Factor speaks Chinese and I’m over here speaking Korean! From the looks of it….we should understand each other but looks are deceiving! Not one damn word is getting understood! I’m a very vocal woman and won’t hesitate to stand up for myself but the Ex Factor, over the years, has been my weakness! Even when I’m sick of looking at him…or hearing him speak (I like a nice mute man which he typically is 99% of the time but that 1% when he speaks?! Fuck My Life)….I still love him! Madness I tell you! Complete madness! I’m trying to do what Toi and Grace suggested by speaking up for myself and I’m trying to be as understanding and patient as Willow suggested while I follow her advice…and trust the process! My village is abuzz! But we all have different types of men in our lives! Mine is speaking Chinese to me and my inner Korean wants to get a brick and do some damage!? Just joking of course because…like…I am a lady!? Good thing the requirements of a lady changes depending on your region! Jersey in the house!?? And lawd knows Kingston, Jamaica women don’t play either! Learn that from Mama Michaels! Now putting down the brick again…sigh…I try to explain in what areas our communication needs to improve! I’ve really had to “wild him up!” Meaning I’ve had to go straight buck wild and let him know not to tap into my crazy! I truly believe that half the time…he has no clue what he has done to piss me off! It’s like the puppy who keeps pissing on the same spot of my carpet while he’s been flunking out of obedience school! Jesus fix it! ? That thing is trying to jump his pissy ass in my lap to spread love and cuddles while I’m LOSING IT and trying not to send his ass back to the pound! Yup! I went there with my analogy! While Jesus is at it…he better throw me some more patience! Whoosa! Breathe in! Breathe out! And whatever you do try not to shout! ? I…am…always…a…work…in…progress! But you know this since you are my faithful readers! ? Side note…I would hate to think of what his puppy analogy for me would be!? Thank goodness the Ex Factor doesn’t blog! But I digress…and that is my temptation today…to avoid getting off track and staying the course with my mind, body, and soul! Today I asked the Ex Factor to stop challenging my womanhood! If I did similar things to him…it would not challenge his manhood. But men and women and their survival codes are so different! What makes a woman great is straight up divine and magical…all at the same damn time! The core of me will never match the core of him. I am woman and I deserve to be loved and appreciated! I want to be wanted by him and only him (for now at least because he has to get his shit together)…and he couldn’t understand me saying I didn’t feel wanted. This is one of the main reasons why I left him last September. There Elijah was smiling bright at just seeing me walk down the hall. Elijah’s dark chocolate skin would glow when I was just within inches of him! It was mesmerizing to see how he reacted to me. I didn’t just feel wanted…I felt ADORED! As a matter of fact….Elijah still looks at me that way! Did I not mention that he’s back and for the next couple weeks we may be indirectly working together? Turned a corner yesterday and there he was…with that winning smile. Now before you get any ideas…I don’t want Elijah back! Not feeling a rip in my asshole and a “Jack Rabbit” vibrator being shoved in my vagina! That’s so November 2015! Lol! I can laugh about that shit now but it sure wasn’t funny then! I do, however, intend to do what some women in my position would do…bring him to his knees and just climax off of that sight! ? Oh Elijah…you weren’t good to me huh? Should have met me at the train station back in April? Regrets boo?! Got your favorite color dress (army green) on along with my favorite pair of heels to symbolically…crush…your…motherfucking balls! Puppies may confuse me but I was put on this earth to train old dogs!?? And since Old Kingston is back….first thing she loves to do is settle a score! Now don’t worry my dear readers…I’m in a professional environment! I won’t even exchange a word with Elijah with exception of the professional hello! The kiss my ass will be understood though…trust and believe! And since I have been read receipting his messages going all the way back to May…this is going to be even more entertaining! But I do have to be careful though because there is a point where old dogs get turned on by having their balls crushed! I just need my 4 inch heels to reach his pain threshold and then release him from it…never to do so again so he doesn’t get addicted!? By the way….where are the basic bitches Elijah so desperately wanted to turn me into? Did they flee because of his 1,500 dollar only ring proposal? Or did he get mad that they bought Trident Gum instead of Big Red? You know there is a huge financial difference between the two?! Elijah and his basic bitch could use that extra 75 cents to go towards their life savings?!? But I digress! Tiffany, are you enjoying this? You are really the only reader that knows up close and personal what a special asshole Elijah is! Yet…I wish him well!? Back to obedience school…and the puppy is still my focus…sigh ~KJM on Temptation Tuesday saying I always feel like lesbians have it easier but unfortunately…I’m straight ? So on goes the daily Chinese and Korean conversations between the Ex Factor and I! Pray for us…we really do need a miracle! Lol.
Well it’s Throwback Thursday and while I am sharing memories about Crazy….I couldn’t help but share this one! It was the first time anyone had ever witnessed me having sex…unexpectedly…of course. ? One afternoon Crazy stopped by for lunch. He typically did not do this because I’m usually in between classes with little time to chat with him but on this particular day I had a huge gap in my class schedule and I was READY for him! I had lingerie under my winter clothes (now you know how cold State College, PA gets)!? We ate Quiznos for lunch as Autumn and I lived above one. Crazy was always trying to get me to try new things so he was feeding me my lunch as we watched television. He wouldn’t tell me what was in my sandwich…he wanted me to be surprised by each bite. Plus he didn’t want to give me a chance to say I didn’t like something in my sandwich upon hearing the ingredients. To this day…only he and my father can get me to drink tea! Probably shouldn’t have mentioned Daddy in this blog at all…especially with what I am about to say! Damn, I’m creeping myself out. Daddy has suddenly got the urge to knock a guy out and doesn’t even know why! Lol. But I digress for real… Crazy use to dribble the tea in between my inner thighs as he licked it up…that was kind of his way of saying that tea was good for me.?? And boy was tea good for me! I get chills thinking about the pleasure and pain he brought into my life. Well back to the day at hand. Just as Crazy was feeding me my last bite (oohhh la la), Autumn came home from work early. Typically she was not home at that hour either so we assumed she was just home on a quick lunch break and would be headed back to work soon! WRONG!? We all got along well so when Autumn asked if we could turn the tv to the TLC channel…we didn’t think anything of it. Crazy and I thought…soon she will head back to work. Well hours later…after two episodes of “The Baby Story,” two episodes of “The Wedding Story” and just before the first episode of “The Dating Story”….I grew impatient and aggravated. Crazy suggested that it was time for him to leave but I instead begged him to “take a nap with me.“? He warned me that there better not be any funny business when we get to my bed. WE WERE TO JUST NAP!!! Let’s back it up for a second! Let me describe what the apartment that I shared with Autumn looked like. It was an EFFICIENCY apartment with a thin wall that separated the living room from our sleeping area. The wall was open on both sides…it was there for privacy but the openings were a reminder that this was still an EFFICIENCY apartment where anyone in the living room area could easily see what was going on in the sleeping area! Damn…we were broke college students! But this story wouldn’t be so memorable nor hilarious if Autumn and I had actually had a bedroom door!? Unbeknownst to Crazy, my lingerie was nastily laying under my clothes. We got in my bed and I slowly took my turtleneck off. Don’t laugh…you know the turtleneck was big back then! Maybe even considered…sexy! Lol. As I undressed to reveal what was waiting for him….Crazy couldn’t resist! Up until this point…he had been very use to dominating me in the bedroom. But he gave me the tools to take control of him and he waited for the day that I would be ready…today was that day!?? I wanted him. I needed him. And at that moment we both forgot about Autumn and “The Dating Story” out in the living room area…probably no more than three feet from us. At first we were quiet…it was my first seduction. I needed to whisper as I was on the attack. I wanted to please him while letting myself know that…that it was okay to make him my prisoner. It was okay for me to freeze him in time…in my inner thighs! I needed to know that…IT WAS OKAY TO CUM INTO MY OWN!?? Just as I’m on top doing a mean whine and grind as I sing Adina Howard’s “Freak Like Me” in my mind…who do I see headed to the kitchen for what I picture to be some milk for her cookies…AUTUMN!? She happened to look over at the exact time that things were getting good and I was now asking Crazy what my name was (yes this was some hood luv)! ? All of a sudden, Autumn drops whatever she had in her hand (you have to understand that from the angle where I was…she was not my main focus…so we lose some of the details of the story?), opens our front door, and runs down the hallway to our neighbor’s apartment! I could hear her banging on that door like her life depended on it! Crazy, for some weird reason, got embarrassed and pushed me off of him! I think he had a lot of respect for Autumn and didn’t want to feel like he had made her uncomfortable in her own apartment! In my mind…I was like well why did she need milk for her cookies anyways?! Aren’t there times when one just eats cookies without milk?! Couldn’t this have been one of them?! Even if she was suddenly parched and wanted juice…couldn’t it have waited…let’s say…another 30 minutes?! So we didn’t get to finish and I was pissed! All my good moves gone to…waste! Had I not suffered enough through “The Baby Story,” “The Wedding Story,” and the damn beginning of “The Dating Story”?! Why these senseless acts against orgasms, Autumn?! WHY?! I later on realized that the whole situation was an accident on all our parts and Autumn went on to be one of the biggest supporters of me landing the BIG O! She would go on to jog drunk on hot summer days and even take an early morning run during a Central PA snow storm just so I could have as many orgasms as I wanted it. I tear up now for two reasons: 1. Autumn’s level of dedication to my orgasms and 2. This time period in my life would be the last time I could have multiple orgasms…much less any orgasm with a man. All hail the Big O! It was good while it lasted! And if you are wondering…Crazy could make me easily climax from ANY position! On top was actually the final position for my climaxes! That dude was a connoisseur of orgasms! And he always made sure I came FIRST….multiple times…before he did.???????? ~KJM on Throwback Thursday saying if that dude wasn’t so CRAZY…old Kingston would unblock him just for the climax of it all…? New Kingston, however, is under new management aka still under construction ?
