This week has been very difficult for me…the first week after a breakup typically is and then I bounce back (well with everyone but the ex factor). I’ve learned so much and on this Serenity Saturday, I want to share 5 things I learned through painful growth: 5. ADVICE! Everyone does things differently so when your family and friends offer advice…remember that they don’t know everything and they are only speaking from their own experiences. You do not have to take their advice, after all you are the master of your own destiny. 4. FEARS! It is human nature for people to give advice from a place of FEARS. Typically when you are making a huge change in your life, loved ones will immediately give advice warning you off of what they are scared to do. If packing up your things and leaving a bad relationship within 24 hours are what you desire to do…don’t let anyone stop you. We all have different fears and strengths. Don’t let other people hold you back. Tap into your strengths and take the risk of moving forward! 3. THOSE WHO ARE WAIT AND SEE PEOPLE! For the last couple years, I’ve felt trapped in my current occupation. This week I asked a friend (who is in a career I would love to be) for some advice and she told me my resume was fine and I just need to keep applying. Now I asked for her advice so I’m not mad she gave it. However, in life, her and I are drastically different! She is a “wait and see person” while I grab life by the balls, roll the dice, and push forward into the unknown. Her advice was good for her but I knew I couldn’t take it. It did not match my destiny on all levels! I could wait and see if Elijah will grow (maybe at age 50? Fml) into a less cheap and controlling man or can do what I did…dump his ass and hand my number to the next dude. Some folks will watch their lives pass them by waiting and seeing. I’m not judging…I’m just saying it’s not for me! I am the master of my own destiny and the only person (besides God) that can determine where I go next is me. I’m not afraid to take the risks! Being trapped, whether in a career or relationship, is a horrible feeling but some people get complacent and accept that this is all their life is going to be! NOT ME! 2. FAITH! If you are a person of deep faith and spirituality, you can never be a wait and see person! Like my good friend, Grace, always reminds me, “Faith without works is dead!” (James 2:14-26). It’s the truth! You can’t just pray about it…you got to be about it! So I know many women would have stayed with Elijah without him ever making a change but that’s not me! Same with my career! I can no longer stay here…I must move on! 1. DESTINY! You are the master of your own destiny! No matter how much family and friends love you, it is ultimately YOU who needs to be invested in your life! No one can walk the walk with you nor talk the talk with you…nor should you expect them to! Good friends and family will check in while you are on your journey but will respect that you have to find your own way! Honor your spirit and your strengths by moving forward in a way that feels good for you. Don’t be afraid to take risks but pray while you do. We are not meant to be exactly alike so even if someone is giving you some annoying advice…respect the fact that you two are different and that they care to offer advice. Most of all, in order to hear your inner voice more clear, remind everyone that in difficult times what you need the most is not a counselor but a LISTENING ear! With all I’ve said, I have faith that this new chapter in all our lives will be great! One Love?~KJM on Serenity Saturday! Get ready for next week! I have some surprises in store for you! Also check out my friends blog, ToiTime at toitime.wordpress.com.