It’s Serenity Saturday and I hardly ever write blogs on this day. Usually I put up a quote and just try to inspire you but today I don’t have any inspiration in me. For those of you who have been following our story from our first meeting, Elijah and I have gone our separate ways. I’ve actually blocked him via phone so he has no way of communicating with me unless we run into each other in a business capacity. Last night, in the middle of a rain storm, I traveled to New York to see Elijah. He had been frustrating me all day and doing his passive aggressive behavior thing where he ignores my texts if I’m saying something he doesn’t like. I never like to make a promise I don’t keep. Drenched from head to toe, I asked Elijah to meet me at a subway stop and he refused. He wanted me to make the entire journey to see him by myself. There’s more to this story on both our ends and some of it I have chosen to keep private. In that moment, when I was showing up for him but he would not show up for me, I realized this summed up our 7 months of dating. Me always going the extra mile and him not doing the same. Soaked right down to my socks, I decided to turn back around and head back to my hometown. The universe made that quite easy. I got back home faster than it had taken me to get in the city during the storm! Before I blocked Elijah, I let him know that I no longer wanted to see him because any man that could not put my safety before his image….wasn’t going to be the man for me! I didn’t even cry. I’ve spent 7 months dealing with his cheapness and controlling ways! Elijah is almost 40 and within a month of dating, I knew exactly why he was single and would stay that way. He’s selfish and uncaring at times. I really tried but at the end of the day my loyalty is to myself! The most disappointing thing, however, is I feel like I let all my readers down. I’m turning 35 soon and still have not found “the one!” I wanted Elijah to be the one to give you all and my heart hope. At this point, I think that alone is my destiny. I don’t ever want to even try again and I’m so sorry we didn’t make it. I honestly tried but Kingston Jael was never made to be controlled and mistreated! I can walk away from anyone! Recently Julio and the ex factor have resurfaced! I’m not leaving Elijah for anyone in my past and NO Phoenix and I have no future as I have to keep reminding you all that I don’t have a drop of feelings for him. I don’t have a Prince Charming and to be honest, I don’t think everyone does. I haven’t even been kissing frogs….I’ve been kissing toads! I’m over dating. Society tells women in their mid 30s if you aren’t married and have no children…just wait to die! Lol. Fuck society! I’m going to keep living but with an understanding that the loves of my life are my friends and family! There is no love story here! But when each of you love and build your families, Kingston will be right there with you! Cheering you on and being excited for you all as I have always been! One Love? ~KJM on Serenity Saturday!
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