Where I Stand Today

Happy Serenity Sunday! I am so sorry that it has been weeks since I have blogged! Work and family life have been crazy! Plus I went on my annual Vegas birthday trip for a week and a half this year! ? It was AMAZING…as always. ?? Vegas is officially my second home! It rejuvenates me in a way that very few places do…and in that process I discover something else about myself! ? These last couple weeks, I took the time to focus on me. Getting back to me…and I encourage you to do the same when you start to feel depleted. My summer body is nowhere near ready but I took some sexy ass photos to remind myself that I’m still one of the baddest boss chicks to walk this earth. ?? Remember that you, too, are fierce as fuck…and never forget to let it show. So many things are going on…too many to blog about in this one blog but there is one update I am okay with sharing with you. Almost three months ago, I took a break from the Ex Factor without telling a single family member nor friend. I felt like I was suffocating in something that will never be what I need it to be and I certainly did not want to take Nicole, Grace, nor Harmony with me. It had to be for me. I am growing and changing and the Ex Factor is not. He is happy with being complacent and I am not. We grew apart years ago and holding on to what use to be is just plain painful. I deserve someone who can be there for me and he deserves someone who speaks his language (perhaps someone in his age group). When you truly love someone…you want them to be happy even if it’s not with you. That is unconditional love. It is a love so free. The Ex Factor thinks he was happy with me but I have faith that soon he will find a greater happiness that makes more sense to him! ?? As for me…I am on my way! ?? Right now I’m happily not dating. Traveling to see Harmony in Vegas and hanging out with Ingrid in NYC has been what’s keeping me going. My friends are truly the loves of my life. I feel so free and so alive with them. They are both in amazing relationships that I am cheering them on in! ?? I still truly believe in love…I just haven’t met my true, unconditional, and reciprocated love yet. And I am in no rush. I am just enjoying where I am. My DMs have been filling up since I have been off of dating but my true love just won’t be in a DM. I don’t think that’s how God works. He will come to me sure and ready. He will have things to offer and he will be the most patient man. And he won’t require that I be less me! ?? That is a love worth waiting on. Maybe in my 50s I will meet him? Who knows? As for now, 37 is about freedom. I am only accepting love that is secure while allowing me to be free at the same time. I don’t know what makes a man love a woman…but I now know that no one can answer that question because when it is God sent it is simply unexplainable. ? ~KJM dropping you a line on Serenity Sunday. Go forth and be free…in love and in all you do. ?