I went to bed Thursday night thinking of the Ex Factor but ended up dreaming of another man…one from my distant past. It was my college sweetheart…the one that played football. In the dream…several friends that we knew once upon of time helped me to find him. We were on the West Coast…makes sense since that’s where he is from. Each person would give me one more clue that would lead me to him. I awoke from the dream early Friday morning…happy…so happy. But I was not sure why. I had not spoken to him since 2012 and we hadn’t dated since 2004. We were never in love but he was “my one that got away.” The first guy I laughed with, the first guy to make me feel special, loyal, kind, caring, and the type of guy who opened car doors for me all the years I dated him…even if it was just us and no one else was around. He would be the only man I had ever dated where his “word was his bond.” Most mistakes made in that relationship were on my part because I had been use to being treated badly so when I met a good guy…I didn’t know how to act. My college sweetheart taught me how to cuddle…like really let a man hold me…I could trust to let the weight of the world fall off my shoulders and let him hold all my worries. He was such an amazing person that I held onto that friendship for 8 years after we stopped dating! Our breakup was mutual (we weren’t in love so doing East Coast to West Coast did not make sense). I only finally let go of our friendship because I wanted him to be happy. And I think he is. From what I hear, he’s in a serious relationship and happily in love. Of course, I am over him and he’s just part of my past. So why dream him? I couldn’t make sense of it until today… I can’t be sure but because my college sweetheart represents the best relationship I ever had…he may pop up into my subconscious to remind me that these kind of men do exist. Perhaps I have to walk through fire to be truly ready for BOAZ! And I pray the dream was signaling to me that I’m close. That maybe the pain will go away and true love will find me. I have come to the conclusion that BOAZ will not be who I prayed for but will instead be the man that has been praying for me! There is some guy out there right now…perhaps suffering from a broken heart…that will appreciate the woman I am. Some guy who will always make time for me and want more of me than just my body. Some guy who goes to bed at night thanking God for me. That’s BOAZ. And my dream, to me, represents that all is not lost in my tears and my heartbreak. BOAZ is somewhere in this world going through something similar while God is preparing him for me. Dreams are often not literal. My college sweetheart represents HOPE to me. So God sent him in a dream…to let me know that it will be okay. ~KJM is still awaiting BOAZ on Serenity Sunday. ❤
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