Sex should NEVER be used as a weapon in a relationship nor in a situationship! When Julio and I lost our virginities to each other…we promised to never deny each other sex. And we kept that promise for all the years that we dated. Upset, happy, sad, or in between we were vocal about wanting to please the other person. However, I was almost always still mad at Julio even after we had sex!!!! I’m tired of telling folks that I can separate sex and love just as easily as some of y’all separate your groceries! ? Let me be clear though that MY body was MINE. Julio nor any other man had no permission to violate it nor pursue me sexually without MY CONSENT! ?? In every relationship including marriage, men please get consent from the women you are with before ever touching her sexually and if she says STOP….you do that! Rape is nothing to be played with! I belong to GOD and only GOD. And the only human being that can give consent for me…is me! Now that that’s covered…lets go back to the matter at hand. I never use sex as a weapon in situationships nor relationships! But there comes a time in a situationship/relationship that a woman may have to shut down the pussy pot until SHE feels safe and secure enough to open it back up to the man she loves. I am at such a time with the Ex Factor! As my last two blogs stated, we have been arguing a lot lately and the arguments have been the worst I’ve ever participated in! It’s so unlike us! We are having huge power struggles over our levels of commitment or lack there of AND small shit that is just masking the real issue! It’s gotten downright ugly! The Ex Factor appears to be very forgiving and since the last blow out we have been doing much better. Yet all this arguing got me thinking about some advice Grace gave me a while ago….since the Ex Factor seems to be addicted to my pussy pot….maybe it’s time to shut that shit down until he gets that act right! Because I don’t believe in using sex as a weapon, I decided against it. Things have gotten so bad though that even our sex life (in my opinion) is being affected by it. I’m not thrilled by our sex life right now because we are so emotionally disconnected! For me it feels like a dog shitting outside twice a day….a routine….in which one must do to survive. No real thrill in shitting twice a day…but I guess I got to ask a real dog that! Lol. On Saturday, I spoke to the Ex Factor about just being platonic friends….at which he gave no direct reply. Since then we have been texting each other all day again and I’ve even woken up to a sweet text from him. Hmmmm…did you hear that?! That’s the sound of my pussy pot slowly closing!!! I LOVE this man but I’m not going to let him walk all over me and drive me crazy!!! So I’m taking Grace’s advice! Now Tiffany before you freak….I’m not pulling a 6 months without sex phrase like I did with Elijah!!! No way I could do without the Ex Factor’s touch that long!!! But I’m giving us a little time to fix our communication and get back on the same page! I know the Ex Factor isn’t ready to settle down and truth be told….neither am I. But we love each other and love takes WORK! I can’t have him making me do all the work and making me feel bad for it when he disappoints me! It’s time he steps up and perhaps if I’m NOT riding him, the fucking picture will become crystal clear for him that he better get his ass in gear! I’m a beautiful, intelligent, and loving woman but if he gets me to revert back into bad girl mode…he will regret it!!!! The vagina was built to outlast the penis in every way….hence why they usually die before us. Lol. Channeling Mama Michaels here!? Now for those of you worried that he may get it from somewhere else…he better fucking worry that I may do the same!!! Besides I’ve freed this puppy many times and I’ve learn two things (1) them young bitches aren’t taking they vitamins like they should and (2) he does love me. ?? Now if he runs into a mature OG (Original Gangsta) like me…I may be in trouble (lol) but if that does happen…it was meant to happen! If you love something…don’t be afraid to let it go! I pray we fly and not sink but only God knows our destiny! So I close up shop for a bit. I’ve got my day job, this blog, and a vacation coming up that all my need my attention. Taking advice from my homegirl, Harmony, and focusing on me…while letting all that other shit fall in place!?? ~KJM on Charm School Monday saying I’m over here masturbating, counting my pussy hairs, and eating Cheerios!?? Don’t need any man under me that ain’t gonna do the WORK!✌?️ And for any other guy that may be reading this…um if y’all ain’t the Ex Factor…I’m not checking for you so back the fuck up! ??
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