It is raining hard here. A dark and dreary Monday…much like how I imagine the night Edgar Allen Poe described in the poem “The Raven.” Only it is morning…a dark and dreary morning filled with unexpected twists and turns in an unexpected world. I have been social distancing for weeks…solo. I video chat and FaceTime my family and friends as much as I can but there is something so isolating when social distancing by oneself. I mean…I am blessed to have my own place….yet I miss the human touch. Well…one particular human touch. The wind is howling and it’s just me around my dining room table. I need to start my day yet something is calling me. I started to write a blog a month and a half ago. A very personal blog but some how…I’m either not ready to share or I just do not feel the story is over. So right now as the winds pick up and visibility is low from my big beautiful living room windows…I want to tell you a story. May be fiction. May be reality. Who the fuck knows? I’ve been by myself for so long that the lines are blurring between fiction and reality. I am not crazy. I am just feeling something. Maybe it’s the weather? Maybe it’s the fact that globally the world is on lock down. All of our lives changed in a moment’s notice and now I am just trying to deal. Are you ready for a tale of two lovers in a world on the brink of madness?! I am just waiting for the lightning to appear now. A storm is brewing. I can feel it? Can you feel it? Well…let me take you there so you too can feel it… That morning I awoke unsure of what the day would bring. I have an impossible need. The need to be touched by my lover but I understand why we have to be separated. My phone screensaver has a picture of us. I never do shit like that. It’s so fucking girly….but these are unusual times. We text everyday and exchange “I miss you’s.” Because we are in the middle of a pandemic, I don’t have time to second guess us. I don’t have time to over think. The what are we doing and the where are we going questions don’t seem to matter now as we are prisoners in our homes. Shit that typically haunts me escapes me now. People are out there dying and it seems the universe is signaling that now is not the time for me to feed into my ego. Don’t believe me? Okay…I’m gonna back it up for you for a brief second before I continue my tale. The last time I saw the Ex Factor was on the morning of February 29. Leap day! Only it felt like we leaped into another fucking dimension. We made love in the wee hours of the early morning but once the sun rose…my ego started a conversation that would end up leading us to the worst argument we have ever had….once his unsure ego had awoken to answer mine!!!! If you recall, in the almost 10 years I have known the Ex Factor, we barely argue in person. This is really only the second time I can remember arguing while staring him in the face. To add insult to injury, somewhere in that conversation, I did something I have NEVER done in front of a lover before….I started crying. I could say more but it would just change the tone of the tale I’m telling. I am in the mood to write about passion….not pain. I am in a place where I desire to ride the blurry lines of reality verses fiction. I am in a zone where I want to take YOU…my readers…to complete ecstasy. Let me get on the ride and we can address the rest at another place and time. I just need to be touched. Studies have shown the importance of a single touch from the moment a baby’s born and up until a person takes their last breath. Touch matters. Keeping this in mind, I get in the shower and lather up. My lover is going to try and come see me. I don’t typically wear makeup when I spend alone time with him because I like our bodies to be one…nothing in between us. Just us in our nakedness. My lover is coming. I’ve had this deep desire for him. Not the type of desire a couple who lives together that may take each other for granted on a regular basis has….but the kind of desire that feels like he had been deployed to a war zone and he is finally coming home. So I prepare. I put makeup on and I slide into one of my sexiest see through dresses. The netted kind….for the best way to lay a trap is to have a net present. I want to captivate my lover’s mind, body, and soul on arrival! The Ex Factor is officially on his way! My heart starts to beat fast. My vagina is moist. I have no clue what we will say to each other but it’s clear time is short and there is so much life to live in these tiny moments. And I JUST WANT TO LIVE LIFE!!! The minute we went on lockdown, I felt like I was no longer living life. I have just been existing. I am so sick of just existing!!! He has arrived! We both have our masks on. First thing we do is lay down and hold hands. I know…it’s forbidden but I need to be touched. It had been weeks since I had been in the presence of a human being that was not my food delivery guy. It’s been JUST ME! So we hold hands. I want to kiss him. I want to take my mask off….he told me he would keep his on if I felt uncomfortable in mine. Truth be told….I’m nervous and my mask is uncomfortable…the Ex Factor has to actually tie another mask for me. So yes this is risky and yes it’s uncomfortable but I would be lying if I said I was not intrigued by the thought of us fucking with masks on! I know! I know! What a weird fucking fantasy to have! It’s a new one and clearly this is the first time we are testing it out. The Ex Factor is already hard…just from us holding hands! It’s agreed upon that best sexual position to execute in a time of corona virus is me being the rider. Actually….let me correct that statement! The best thing to do is NOT do what we are doing but I digress! Thanks to all those back bends I’ve learned in yoga….I definitely think this was the best way to go. I am not the best with measurements but I assure you…this was some freaky shit…linking our sensual parts….while giving us as much space as possible to maneuver. Masks still on. Interesting note about the masks…is you exert so much more energy as you execute each position. Felt like I had just showed up to a damn fitness bootcamp…with just enough energy to get the job done…before passing out! Because we had not had sex in over a month and a half and had been social distancing during that time…I did not expect much from our sexual encounter. I mean we’ve been masturbating our way through this self quarantine that I did not expect it to be a long ride…much less one I would climax in. I mean I was just happy to hold his hands! Out of the corner of my eyes….during one of my back bends, I see the Ex Factor looking at my closet mirror that’s on the right side of us. This dude is definitely having the same fantasy I’m having….only he just took it up a notch. I mean…I was not watching us. Kind of hard to…the way I am positioned! But he’s into it so now I’m even more engaged. Breathlessly riding him from every back bend position I can think of and that my body will allow. Digging my un-manicured nails into his flesh. We are both so turned on. Wait….how the fuck are we so turned on during such a stressful time! I wish I could kiss him. I wish I could whisper naughty stuff in his ears. I wish we did not have all of these confinements. I wish we were free. But I’m grateful for the fantasies we create together. We are still going. My bed sounds like it’s going to break. I’m warning him that we cannot break my bed! Mid ride, I start to fantasize about some of the things we use to do when we were not restricted. I speak those fantasies out loud. He chimes in. We are in sync. The Ex Factor whispers something to me that I always love to hear. It feeds into my need to control what happens in our bedroom and for now…it still stays between us. I think that’s one of the reasons why I have loved him like no other man….because this one thing…he’s the only one that’s given it to me. I’m starting to shake but I’m still focusing on him. He’s concentrating hard…. How could I have missed it?! The Ex Factor is on a similar mission! My body is convulsing and I feel like I can barely breathe with this damn mask on. I’m shaking and sweating. I’m starting to have an out of body experience. My poor fucking bed. We really bout to break this shit. My neighbors are probably cussing me the fuck out. Yet I cannot focus on any of that. He’s going to take me there before I take him there. I cannot believe this shit! I’m focused on his pleasure and he was focused on mine. All of a sudden my body starts to speak in tongues and I’m cuming. My entire body is trembling but like a good jockey, I’m still holding on for dear life until we both cross the finish line! Thank goodness babe was right behind me because I don’t think I could have held on any longer! Fuck! I’m still shaking….aftershocks. And I’m also thinking….what the fuck just happened here?! I…was…not…ready….for the depth of passion we shared on this particular evening. I am still just laying there…mask on…sweating…and shaking. ~KJM reporting on passion in a time of Corona. Maybe this shit happened. Maybe it didn’t. The lines are so blurry between reality and fiction. But never question why I love that man. 💙 I hope you are all being good to yourselves. Love, touch, feel, and fuck (from a social distance or once quarantine is over) when you can because life is so short and true passion is unique. DISCLAIMER: This blog is for entertainment purposes only! Do not try anything in it! Continue to practice social distancing as recommended by the CDC. One love❤️
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