We have just entered the arch nemesis of “Cuffing Season.“ Or as I like to call it…the “Speed Dating Season.” This is the season that makes me want to pull my tracks (extensions) out and run stalk naked crazy mad in the streets. It’s the “I’m closing out the bar for one night and trying to take your panties with me” season. Now for all the marrieds, especially Willow, who are happily married but love to reminisce about dating the way it never was (great…it was never fucking great), I say to you…stop the madness! Dating is and will always be a disaster…especially the older we get. It’s like only rejects or lunatics are left. Fuck…I’m not married so I may be referring to myself to some extent. Lunatic would be my title for sure. Then you got the unhappily marrieds pretending to be single. You got to make sure you don’t catch a case during this season because the heat got people acting like fools! To all my singles out there, here’s a guide to summer dating! Make sure to ask these questions and watch out for the nonverbal cues. If need be…RUN don’t walk to your next date. Single and ready to mingle?! Pack your birth control pills and condoms in your bags/wallets and prepare yourself for the JUNGLE of dating! “May the force be with you!” Here are my top 5 crazy, outrageous, and yet necessary questions to ask while dating in this season: 5. ARE YOU CURRENTLY MARRIED? YEA I AM GOING TO NEED TO SEE YOUR RING FINGER! It’s crazy to me when people aren’t honest about their current marital status. For me lying only prevents the inevitable…a brick in the face now or later?! Just kidding…kind of. ? It is important to ask this question even if you met the person on an online singles dating site. Don’t line yourself up to get GOT! Ask important questions upfront and quickly. 4. DO YOU HAVE A WIFE/WIVES IN ANOTHER COUNTRY?! Now y’all know I date internationally…so this question is a must. Don’t try to play the I am in the USA so I’m single hand with me…might get those hands broke by either me or one of your wives waiting for you overseas!?? 3. DO YOU HAVE CHILDREN? IF SO, DO YOU ACTIVELY TAKE CARE OF THEM?! I will never understand why a guy pauses on this question or looks like his memory has escaped him as if he is trying to remember if he has children? Fool, do you have kids or not?! Not a tough question! Ladies, if his answer is vague here….RUN! It’s just simply not a good sign. Same for you guys! Contrary to popular belief, there are dead beat moms! No sense in dating someone who doesn’t give a fuck about their DNA cause guess what?! If their children are low on their priority list…where do you think you and your possible future family will fall?! RUN! 2. CRIMINAL RECORD?! Now while it’s not good to judge a book by its cover…you definitely need to know if you are dating “Captain Smack A Hoe!” There are ways of doing background checks on your new boyfriend/girlfriend…starting with the fact that criminal records are public. If you know what state, county, or city to check….hop to it especially if your gut is telling something is off with your new boyfriend/girlfriend. 1. CONDOM USE! Now this may sound crazy but there are some folks who still don’t believe in safe sex even if they are having a one night stand. You would think these dummies would be smart enough not to say so but some just don’t care! So ask a dude…on a scale of 1 to 10…1 being NEVER and 10 being ALWAYS…how often do you use condoms?! Now they still may lie but since you can’t administer an STD test when having a spontaneous night of sex…asking may save you the trip to random baby daddy/baby mama land! I know a lot of people in the older generation who the one night stand got! You can enjoy your summer…SAFELY! Don’t expect others to look out for your health. That is your responsibility! ~KJM on Temptation Tuesday saying whether you are looking for something serious or just some fun…wrap it up, enjoy speed dating the best you can, and remember it’s a jungle out there so don’t get got! Come prepared!??
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