I meant to write this ignorant mess yesterday! Of course, I got sidetracked with tech issues for my webpage. A few weeks ago, I thought I had solved all single women’s dating issues by writing “2017 Resolution: Date Ugly Men With Money (The Pretty Men Take Too Much Work Edition)!” It’s no secret that I have a thing for young hot guys! Shout out to the Ex Factor!? Even when my men were my age, they were pretty UNLESS I was dating on the rebound of a long situationship where my heart got broken…then I date fucking ugly guys with money! Well…more like they find me! ? After laying down the pros of dating an ugly man with money…one of my readers/listeners (and good friend) informed me that ugly men now think they are cute! ??? So back to the drawing board I went…in hopes of finding a new dating resolution for single women in 2017. As luck would have it…a few days later Bravo had a “Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills” marathon. Enter Erika Girardi aka Erika Jayne! ?? Erika’s husband is 32 years her senior (they married when she was 27 years old) and have been happily married for 17 years! As I watched each episode, I could tell Erika’s very RICH AND MATURE husband, Thomas, really loves and appreciates her! And suddenly the light bulb went on and I just knew this was the answer for single women all over the world! Forget pretty men who know they are fucking pretty and use it against us! ✌?Off to the more mature WITH MONEY! And when I say mature I’m not talking 10 years or less….I’m talking 32 years older than you…to be almost exact! Yup! Time to peruse “Our Time” for our life partners! Forget “Match” or “Tinder” and on to something with more financial stability and not afraid of commitment! ?? Now before you get skeptical about my new dating resolution…let me propose 11 Possible Benefits To Dating And Marrying A Man 32 Years Your Senior:
11. HOT YOUNG GUYS OR GUYS YOUR AGE SEX CAN GET OLD FAST! Penis! Penis! Penis! It’s always on the menu! Hot guys serve it up easily and for those who can lay the pipe too (yum?) we climax and then what? There’s no substance there! Hot guys can barely carry on a conversation! Penis! Penis! Penis! That’s all we have left to briefly talk about before we hit the sheets! Great sex is important in a relationship but it is certainly not everything! Bills need to be paid! Real companionship is needed! Penis cannot do all of that! Penis’ only goal is to satisfy itself and that can leave some of us women with a drying after effect!
10. AT 32 YEARS YOUR SENIOR DEATH IS NEAR SO COMMITMENT BETTER BE HIS MIDDLE NAME (WITH JESUS BEING HIS FIRST)?! Just dating a few years older may still get you a man interested in playing the field. But at 35 years old…I expect that dating a man 32 years older than me (67 years old to be exact….ugh way older than my parents?)….I better find a man financially secure and done with his dick traveling from pussy to pussy! Serious commitment better be this man’s focus! If he is 67 with commitment issues…I may as well bury his ass now! Ain’t nobody got time for him to find himself! I’m hoping dick has a serious retirement plan at 67 years old. If it looks like games…I’m out! ✌? I don’t have time to play games with grandpa…Pretty Ricky already wasted so much of my time! ✌?✌?✌?
9. YOUR BIOLOGICAL CLOCK SHOULD BE FREE OF PRESSURE! Unless trying to produce a legitimate heir, dating a man 32 years your senior should free you of pressure to have children! Most likely this man would have been married already, divorced, and has grown children! Whew! I won’t need to go get my biological clock from under the MAC truck it rolled under on I95! ?? I can rest if I want to. And since his children should be grown…there should be minimal baby mama drama and I shouldn’t have to be helping to raise someone else’s children! ?? It’s a win win!
8. FINANCIAL SECURITY! Now I’m a chick that has my own but it sure wouldn’t hurt to marry a man who could pay off my student loans with one check! Yassss lawd! ?? This would free me up to send Sallie Mae pictures of my butt cheeks to kiss in repayment of their years of adding on unnecessary interests to my loans! ??????Thank you to my mature lover! ? FYI… if you are dating someone 32 years older than you and he isn’t financial set…what is the point? Unless he is already your soulmate. But just think…what would Erika Jayne do?! ?
7. WHERE VIAGRA CANNOT TAKE HIM…HE WON’T BE ABLE TO GO! Cheating should be less of an issue unless he’s an old dog. Hot young guys have lots of options so they are more tempted to cheat! It’s a pussy fest in their 20s and 30s! When the wind blows…a hot young guys dick gets hard! Let’s hope this isn’t the same with pop pop! ?
6. LOVE! At 32 years my senior, my older man should not be afraid of showing love and saying he loves me! He should already know what it can cost him to be so prideful. Affection should be the name of the game! It’s clear Erika and her hubby, Thomas, really do love each other! It’s just the look he gives her that lets me know…there’s something there that money did not buy! ❤
5. COMMUNICATION! I’m hoping that life experience will make my mature lover a better communicator! Or at least smart enough to know when we are in trouble so we can get counseling. I’m praying he won’t be stuck in his ways like Pretty Ricky was and that my mature lover will let me into his heart easily! Also, if he’s 67 years old…I can almost bet money that 99% of our communication will not be through fucking text messages! Damn that Pretty Ricky! ???
4. VACATIONS! A mature man should easily be able to plan surprise vacations for you! Vacations are the key to my heart! I have yet to date a well traveled man. I’m hoping that at 32 years my senior, he will love to travel and even more so…he will love to travel with me…watching my eyes get larger in awe of all the new things I’m seeing! ?
3. HIS GOAL SHOULD BE TO MAKE ME HAPPY! While I’m not thrilled about the idea of being a second or third wife…I’m hoping that a 67 year old man will have enough relationship experience to now value his marriage! I want us to focus on making ourselves happy first so that we can make each other happy! My mature lover should have the strength and courage to fight for me when things get difficult…knowing that I am truly the woman he wants to spend the rest of his life with. He’s roamed the world, fucked many women but can still pass all STD tests, married, divorced but has a good coparenting relationship with his ex, had children and is an amazing father, and through it all…learned so much that he can share with me! It’s even better if he never married but to be honest with such a huge age gap…it’s hard to believe he wouldn’t have had a life before me!
2. YOU WILL ALWAYS BE A PRETTY YOUNG THANG (PYT) TO HIM! Because he’s so much older, you are always going to be a sex kitten! All the self doubt that guys our age or younger guys can cause when they are running after the next hot thing…SHOULD perish in this relationship! You are forever his pretty young thang! ?
1. HE WILL SUPPORT MY ENTREPRENEURSHIP AND NOT BE THREATENED BY IT! None of my “men” have ever really supported how hard I work and how much I want to build my empire. Some of them verbally supported me but their actions said otherwise! Others outright bashed me for my ambitions. It would be nice to be with a man who loves what he does and is secure in himself….so much so that he can cheer my dreams on! ~KJM already perusing the “Our Time” dating sites on Throwback Thursday in search for my 67 year old billionaire! ??? With a man like that…time is definitely of the essence! ?
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